Resident Members are the backbone of Mile in My Shoes.
Our Resident Members are people experiencing homelessness and other barriers who have committed to joining our Run Mentors three days a week to run towards something better. They run to get healthy, they run towards a new life for themselves. Through running they transform their lives, and the lives of everyone around them.
Meet Wayne, Team Nokomis Resident Member
In honor of Veteran’s Day we’re highlighting some of the Members of Team Nokomis. Team Nokomis began in 2023 through a partnership with Every Third Saturday, a local organization that exists to assist veterans in finding new purpose after military service. This season we’ve been honored to welcome 27 veterans onto Team Nokomis. Wayne is one of those Members:
“I was attending college at the U of M on September 11, 2001 when the first plane hit. I remember walking into Northrop Auditorium, watching the first building collapse, and thinking it was fake. But once I realized it was not, I made up my mind to finish that year of school, and then join the Marines in the fall.
When I joined the Marines, my experience was one of instant camaraderie amongst the enlisted. It was patriotism - we were going to fight for our country! I got a lot of support from the community , and my family was especially proud of me. I’m Native American, an Oglala Lakota Sioux, and in my culture when you do something honorable for the people you are given a name. My grandmother, a medicine woman, gave me the name ‘Ehake Iyanka’ - a name that means ‘last one running’. That name was handed down from my grandfather. During the 1890s in the Wounded Knee massacre, he was a child, running from the massacre and came upon a neighboring band of Sioux - that was the name they gave him.
I served in the US Marine Corps for twelve years, active duty for four years from 2002 to 2006, stationed in Hawaii and Japan. I served the rest in the Select Marine Corps Reserve as a Military policeman until 2014. Deployed twice, first to Djibouti in the Horn of Africa, and second to Kabul, Afghanistan where I trained the Afghan National Police.
When I joined the military, there was a policy called “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”, but while I was serving it was lifted. Because of that, I lived two different lives. It was very challenging.
During my active duty in the military I was sexually assaulted multiple times. I loved serving my country and being a US Marine meant so much to me. The choice to stay and continue to serve despite what I went through is something that I have to live with for the rest of my life. I struggle to this day because of the abuse I experienced. I grapple with the fact that I still cherish my military service, but it was because of the trauma I experienced during it that I ultimately left in 2014.
My transition to civilian life has been difficult. It was unexpected. I feel like I am never really going to be a civilian again. When I left the military, I got a lot of support from the VA but I struggled with cycles of substance abuse and I ended up homeless for three years. A group of us Veterans who were on the street used to go to the Downtown (Mpls) Central Library. We would hang out there from open to close because it was the only thing we could do. It was kind of like a little community up there. One of the librarians told me about classes they were offering on basic computer skills and after three sessions, they would give you a laptop. Once I got the laptop, I didn’t have to worry about the computer time limits. I was able to do my own research about organizations helping Veterans and talk to friends through social media.
I also kept up with the VA and when a room opened at House of Charity (transitional housing), I had somewhere to stay. The VA paid for a six month stay there. During that time, Every Third Saturday (ETS) was there to help me in many ways. In the spring of 2022, I began a recovery program at ETS called Warriors Path. I was committed, and thought, ‘I can do this!’ I went through the six weeks and finished it without even using. I showed up every day.
After I completed Warrior’s Path, I applied for a Veteran Readiness benefit that allowed me to enroll in Minneapolis Community and Technical College to pursue a Cyber Security and Defense Degree. I also was able to secure an emergency housing voucher. It was exciting - everything was moving fast. I moved into my apartment in August 2022 just in time for classes to start.
When I was homeless, I had so many resources because I am a veteran. Others were not offered the same services. I want to build something like a website that allows Veterans to access resources easily. Many Veterans have to hope that they say the right thing to the right person at the right time. Instead of having to dig through websites, searching for resources, I want to get it right to their fingertips. My goal is to use the support and connections I’ve made accessible to everyone. I feel hopeful.
I also want to start learning more about my Native American heritage and get more involved in the Sioux Lakota community. This year, I’d really like to participate in a vision quest and Sun Dance ritual. The vision quest is physically challenging and both rituals require a clear focus so I am even more determined to maintain sobriety to be able to do that.
As for running, I want to keep moving and build endurance. I was so grateful when Mile in My Shoes came along. I like running by myself because I can really push myself physically, but I also enjoy running with a group because of the camaraderie. Running with MiMS is fun! It’s great to have people that you know are there, showing up for each other consistently and it holds me accountable for getting back into running. I am just really grateful that Mike J gave me that pair of shoes. Those shoes and being a part of this group is a gift. I know I would not be out here running without MiMS.
I want to stay as involved with MiMS as possible in the off-season and come back next season. I want to come back to this group because of the community. And I want to earn that alumni shirt!”
We greatly appreciate Wayne for sharing his story with Mile in My Shoes. If you’d like to show him a bit of gratitude and support his future goals, feel free to contribute to those by sending a few dollars to his cashapp linked here ($Dwaynzie).
Meet Godana, Team UGM Resident Member
It was still pitch dark out when, on a recent Tuesday morning on a basketball court outside of Union Gospel Mission in downtown St. Paul, Team Captain Matt called Resident Member Godana to the center of the circle. By light of headlamp, Matt addressed his teammates: “I am nominating Godana to be the next Team Captain because I see him coming out here every single day, and I see he is taking all this seriously.”
“I haven’t been nominated for too many things in my life,” said Godana. “So that felt really good. I’ve really been trying to work on my leadership skills, and to come out of my shell more. Being part of MiMS has really helped me in that area - getting out of my comfort zone and being around people. Usually, I don’t go to places where I don’t already know the people. Before, I didn’t really trust people.
Growing up, I really just learned to keep to myself because I had experiences that caused me to lose trust in people. My twin sister and I were born in a refugee camp in Nairobi, Kenya. My parents left Ethiopia before I was born because we are Oromo and we were treated poorly. I don’t even know the whole story, but I know there was civil strife and not many opportunities, and my dad had always dreamed of coming to America. He moved to Seattle not long after we were born, but my mom did not want to leave her family. My parents separated and my mom moved back to Ethiopia - but did not bring me and my sister. I think we stayed with family friends until my dad sent for us, when we were five. How did my mother let us go? Did she think we would have a better life? What was going through her mind?
My mom passed away when I was thirteen - before I ever saw her again. I have a lot of unanswered questions - questions I’ve tried hard to suppress all these years. She did send some gifts and call us sometimes - that makes me think she thought about us. Growing up with my dad, there was very little emotion. Our relationship wasn’t very open - I think it’s just how he was raised. I tried to ask my dad these questions a few times but he clearly didn’t want to talk about it, so I stopped. Maybe I didn’t even want to know the answers.
Our neighborhood in Seattle was very diverse, immigrants from around the world, and I appreciate that, but my sister and I were the only Oromo in our school. I liked school up until about middle school. That’s when I started drinking and smoking weed. I had a lot of anxiety as a kid, and drinking and smoking helped. Early in high school a friend convinced me to try the cross country team, and I actually really enjoyed that for a few months. But then I got in with a bad crowd and stopped showing up. By the time I was 14-15 I just stopped coming home a lot - I would be gone for weeks at a time. I got expelled from a few schools, and by that point my dad - who worked in a laundromat for many years - had just sort of given up trying with me.
By what should’ve been my senior year in high school I had just stopped going and was working at an Autozone, and making good money, so I didn’t think I needed school. Around then I decided to leave Seattle and go to Los Angeles. I had been on a trip to California when I was younger and always thought about moving there one day. But I was arrested for a robbery soon after I got there - it’s a complicated story, but I was definitely hanging out with bad people - and I ended up in jail for six months. Jail in Southern California - it was awful.
Honestly, after that point, there are a lot of blanks in my story because I am still working on saying them out loud. There have been years of jail and treatment programs. I haven’t even told a lot of my story to my sponsor - it’s an important part of the twelve steps, and I know I need to do it. And I know I will get there. But one thing I know - I am trying hard to be a totally different man.
I have been here to Union Gospel Mission before, but I wasn’t ready. I have a 13 year old daughter, and when she was eight months old I got into an accident while under the influence while she was in the car. You’d have thought that would’ve done it for me, but no. I have a stepson whose own father was murdered. He calls me dad, and while I love that now, at first it was so much pressure - here is another child to fail.
In 2017, I came here, to CRC (Christ Recovery Center at UGM). But I wanted to do recovery on my own terms, and it doesn’t work that way. Last time, I said I was doing this for my kids. But now I know I have to do this for myself. I’ve got to get myself right so that I can be there for them.
People who were here and knew me five years ago can see how different I am this time. I’m talking less, listening more. I know I can’t do things “my way”, I can’t skip the steps. But what I’m worried about right now is that as I keep doing better and better, I will get too comfortable and start thinking “Oh, I’ve got this.” I need to remember the feeling of despair I felt when I walked in this door.
Being part of Mile in My Shoes is a big part of doing things differently this time. Keeping to myself or to people I’m comfortable with has caused me to put up a wall, to protect myself. But after being here about three weeks, I worked up the courage to ask one of the Members, Chad, about the group out there stretching. I really just thought it was going to be about fitness. The first morning I went out and everyone hugged me - I’m not gonna lie that threw me a little bit! It was more hugs at one time than I’d ever had in a day! Immediately I was overwhelmed by the love and total acceptance I felt. It was just instant - ‘we accept you in.’ So yeah, I didn’t realize that it was about so much more than running - but about a sense of belonging, about love.
One thing that is really helping me is that we are coming together around running, but it’s even more about community and getting to know one another. I’m getting more comfortable opening up about myself. I’m learning that there are good people out there who aren’t trying to get something from me, there is no ulterior motive. They just want to get to know me - they value me for who I am. Through this I am learning that you can let people in without being hurt.
Talking with some of the Mentors on our runs, I have learned that they get as much joy out of this as I do. Understanding that this is mutual has been really important to me. The Mentors are choosing to be here with us, and we are choosing to be here too. We are all here to get better. Even more than anyone saying this, I can feel it.
Running with MiMS has me looking at other areas of my health now, too. I needed something like this to help me quit smoking, which I have been working on and making progress. Being a part of this team is actually part of a lifestyle change - I’m gonna be a runner now. A runner is someone who is conscious of their health, but it’s also about being a part of a community. I want to get to the point where I want to run on my own. But for now, I want to run with Mile in My Shoes.”
Meet Matt, Team VOA Roseville Alumni + Distance Team Member
Around 5:45am on October 1, 2023, Distance Team and Alumni Member Matt was en route to the starting line of the Twin Cities Marathon when he got word that the race he’d been training for for over five months had been canceled. “My stomach dropped. I was in disbelief,” he recalls. “Honestly had I not been with a MiMS Run Mentor (Kim) I would’ve just gone home. Instead, we went to the starting line to meet the rest of the group.
“I was really upset - the day marked nine months sober for me, and the race was a really big deal. But the group decided to run together for a shorter distance, and so I joined, even though I’ll admit I was grumpy about it. And by the end of the run, it didn’t seem as much like the end of the world. Isn’t that the thing with running? I went home feeling much better - and actually pretty proud of myself.”
Using running as a tool to cope with strong emotions and calm his anger has become second nature for Matt, who started running with Mile in My Shoes in the spring of 2022 with Team Roseville.
“I guess you could say I have had to deal with a lot of anger and resentment from my childhood. I was adopted as a baby, because my birth mother struggled with severe mental health issues. I struggled a lot with my family growing up because I was extremely sheltered. My sister and I were homeschooled through high school, and we weren’t involved really in anything outside the home. No sports, not many activities, really no friends. My parents didn’t want us exposed to outside influences. My dad had anger issues, and we walked on eggshells constantly.
There are some personal strengths that have come from my upbringing - I am a really good self-starter and self-learner. But there was a lot of negativity, too. Because of the way I was brought up, I believe I was stunted emotionally and socially. I had an extreme fear of conflict and had a hard time sticking up for myself. I got my associates degree while still in high school, but it was almost all online. So the first time really ever leaving the house was after that.
I left home at 18 and I was very socially awkward. I had such a hard time with other people my age. I didn’t know rock paper scissors, I couldn’t relate to pop culture references. I didn’t understand boundaries, or pick up on social cues. But I started to work - I had a job in manufacturing during the day and I managed a grocery store in the evening. I knew how to work hard, and I had saved almost $20K before I was 20. But I didn’t know how to talk to girls or friends, and outside of work, I was lonely and lost.
It was around that time that I started to smoke weed - and all the sudden I kind of had a network of people to hang out with. And I had money, so I could buy drugs for myself and for others. You could say I bought friends that way, and people took advantage of me. One of the guys at the manufacturing plant found out I smoked weed, and asked if I’d tried meth. That was the start of my big problems.
When I was still twenty, my family said I either needed to go to Teen Challenge or we were done. This was where I learned a lot of my social skills - this experience was huge for me. It is also where I started running. I’d literally never done any sports or exercise before but there was a guy, Dan who would take anyone who wanted on a run a few mornings a week. I think we were all looking for a way just to get outside for a few hours and in the fresh air. The first time I ran just about killed me! But it was so good to just be talking to other people. Dan kept track of our mileage and that was really motivating for me - it felt like I was achieving something.
I graduated from Teen Challenge, and things were going well when the bottom fell out again. I had my first manic episode - I know now that my mother also had Bipolar Disorder - and I was committed to the hospital. I was medicated, but mistakes with the anti-psychotics left me in a really bad place, I was basically a zombie. It was after some time in that state that I started shooting meth again. I was in love with shooting meth. I finally felt alive again. That was in 2015. Over the next five years, I went to 15 different treatment programs and did a fair amount of jail time.
By the end of 2020, I was starting to get things back together. I had finally graduated from a program I’d never made it through before, I got my own apartment for the first time, got my driver’s license back and I was in a relationship. Just when things were starting to really come together, I relapsed, and this time it was bad. I overdosed and I almost didn’t make it. It took five narcan to revive me, and I was on a ventilator.
Once I was stable, I was committed again, this time to a program up in Fergus Falls. I was completely broken. I had extreme anger and resentment and hurt - at myself, at others, at where I was and what I had lost - and I needed to challenge it. There were no drugs to be found there, and what did I have left that I could control? Well, I was allowed to run laps around the building. So, I started running again. I had a GPS watch, and I started with a half mile, then a mile. After a couple of months I became known as “the running guy” because I was out there every day. Those laps helped me calm down and clear my head - it was so good for me. I ran 177 miles in 3 months...all around that building.
The rest of 2021 was a struggle - I went in and out of locked facilities. When I got out in early 2022, I reached out to my friend Tiffany for some support. She had just been released from federal prison and told me I should check out this running group that she was a part of at her halfway house. At that point I had just registered for the Twin Cities Marathon, because I really wanted to stick with running this time and I knew having something tangible would help me stick with it. She gave me (Team Roseville Resident Manager) Mike’s (Jurasits) number and I called him. He invited me to come to the run that same night.
I will admit that I was skeptical - I’m not used to people being positive and nice for no reason, you know? I also didn't think they would actually run that much, either! But I went to the run and right there I was sold. It was not what I expected - the energy was so positive and people were so welcoming. They wanted me to sign this commitment contract and I wasn't sure, but I read it and thought, I can get on board with all of this.
I wanted to uphold my commitment - to the team and to myself - and so I came to every run unless I absolutely couldn’t. To get to the team runs I took two buses - the trip took 90 minutes. For the morning runs, I’d leave my house around 4:30am. After the runs I took the bus to my outpatient treatment and then my job at Caribou. It was long, but it was worth it because I needed the support of the team.
In July, I ran my first race with MiMS - the a 5K on the track. I almost didn’t do it - I was going through tough stuff mentally. But my pacer Ben (Moberg) was so great. We got to the last lap and I was really starting to burn - I would’ve pulled back had I been alone. But Ben was like no, we’re gonna keep this up, we got this. I figured ‘If he thinks I can do it, then maybe I can.’ I was so shocked to see the ribbon in front of me at the end, I hadn’t even realized I was in first.
In August, just a few months before the marathon, I relapsed hard. But my commitment to myself and to MiMS helped me get back on track. I’ll be damned if I will let shooting dope derail this marathon after I already told everyone I was doing it! I even decided to fundraise for MiMS at that time. I’m not big into supporting causes because I am skeptical of most. But when I look at what MiMS has provided me - with the ‘stuff’, yeah, but mostly the support - I have zero problem asking for help from my people, because they can see how much this program has done for me.
Completing the marathon last October was hands down the most inspiring thing I’ve ever done. I’m here to say that the rush of heroin and meth are nothing like what I felt that day. Those highs end a few hours later in loneliness and shame. The marathon was the opposite - I had a warm feeling that just grew and grew. Using drugs, you see the worst of humanity - people doing unthinkable things to themselves and their loved ones. Marathon day, strangers were cheering for us and handing us water - if that isn’t the best of humankind! The positive energy was mind-blowing. Getting there was really hard, and I almost didn’t make it, but I did. And I EARNED it. And I will have that accomplishment forever.
As soon as I crossed the finish line last year I knew I would be doing it again, and so I signed up for the Distance Team this year. Even though I am living in Rochester and did most of my running alone, Tiffany and I would drive up every other weekend to run with the team. We have such great conversations on the longer runs. Before every drive we’d be like ‘Are we really gonna go all this way? and then in the car home we’d always say, ‘oh that was such a good idea.’
I’m over nine months sober now, and I have a good feeling about this time. I’ve connected with my biological sister, and we have such a great relationship even though she lives in Germany - she is a huge part of my support system. This time around I am taking things seriously - I am doing the steps and going to the meetings. And running is part of my treatment plan now - if I don’t run and connect with others, I’m not taking care of myself. And the way I feel about myself after every run - that I accomplished it, that I am worthy - is huge for my recovery.
While at first not being able to run the marathon I’d trained so hard for was a blow, by the time Matt (Hourigan, Distance Team Mentor) and I reached the capitol on Oct 1st, he was helping me get registered for the Hixon 50K on October 29th. I’ve never run that far before, and I just ran on a trail for the first time last weekend - that was such a new and peaceful experience for me. I am really excited, and I know I have good company.
I would love to be a Mentor with Mile in My Shoes one day, because I’ve had a lot of rough go’s. I have started over so many times. I’ve walked that path, and I know what it’s like to think “oh I could never do that.” But anybody can - I know from experience. I am proof.” Check the update following Matt’s 50K race!
Meet Robbie
Meet Robbie, Team VOA Roseville Alumni + Distance Team Member
On Sunday morning, Robbie woke up at 4am, too nervous to sleep. It was the morning of his first ever half-marathon, City of Lakes, which he would be running with as part of the Mile in My Shoes Alumni Distance Team. Completing the race would be one of several milestones this past week, including a big promotion at work and the one year anniversary of his release from prison. “I’ve been out for one year, and it’s the longest I’ve been on the outside since I was 15,” he shared.
“I left home at 14. It’s taken me a long time to speak about this, but I was abused by two different stepfathers and my older brother. My stepfather broke my nose and that was the last straw - I left. I had nowhere to go and I stayed wherever I could - friend’s houses, empty boats, the park. I tried for a while to keep going to school but it didn’t last long. I started using [drugs and alcohol] and by 15 I was in a juvenile prison.
I would get out for short periods of time, but mess things up and go back. I was a piece of shit. People abused me, my father didn’t own me, and my mother didn’t protect me. I’ve always believed I deserved everything bad that came my way.
I got very wrapped up in prison life, I hung out with the “lifers”. I didn’t trust authority, I wouldn’t “snitch”, and I was involved in people getting hurt. One day, one of the lifers - who had already done 34 years - said ‘Little brother, what are you doing?’ I told him ‘I want everyone to know that I am the man.’ He said to me, ‘Little brother, you aren’t the man. If you were the man, you’d be at home taking care of your family.’ That changed everything for me.
I have six children, and one passed away in 2018 while I was in prison. I wasn’t there to bury him, or to support his siblings as they went through it. So when I got out of prison I vowed to myself, and to my kids, that I would not go back. Yet when I got to the halfway house (VOA Roseville Re-entry) a year ago, I almost immediately began to doubt my ability to be successful.
All I could think about was going back - I was almost wishing it. ‘You’re gonna fail, you’re a loser, you’re better off in prison. You can’t understand technology. You don’t know what Uber is! No one is gonna give you a job.’ On top of the negative self-talk, I felt like I had even less freedom at the halfway house. I was in such a negative, negative spot.
A housemate, Eric, told me about Mile in My Shoes - he was running - but I was so broken that I didn’t really hear it. Then one day in comes Matt (D’olimpio, MiMS program coordinator) to recruit people. He was bouncing around just exuding joy and happiness - and he was completely sober! - and I was like what is wrong with this dude? And how can I get some of it? So I joined.
Right away, I met a Run Mentor named Geno. And I was like wait, I know this guy from Lino Lakes! He’s a Mentor?? He was just wearing the grays and blues with me. This really challenged one of my core beliefs about myself, about people like me and where we could go. I started running and hearing from other guys who had been where I’d been and my walls started crumbling down. I had felt undeserving, but if these guys could do it, couldn’t I? They had a number too. Maybe I have a shot at this. The entire team of Mentors, the way you treated me. These were some very successful people who were looking at me like a human being, who were genuinely loving me. Maybe I could love myself, too.
I can’t think of a time when I’ve turned back into the VOA driveway after a team run when my eyes aren’t welling with tears. If I complete a mile, I can say I did that, I didn’t fail at that. That gives me hope that my life is, that I am, different now. Now I say, I’m going to run three miles, and I go do it. That means I have changed.
Resident Member Manager Jen sort of tricked me into my first race, the Drumstick Dash 10K. You all are good at that, persuading people to get outside their ‘norm’. Then at the beginning of this year, she suggested I join the Distance Team, and I was sort of committed before I even realized we would be running a half marathon!
The start of the race was so many people - the crowd was hundreds but felt like thousands. For someone who has been in prison a long time, I didn’t like that - I don’t want people I can’t see behind me,I get jumpy. It was scary, but I survived it - and that was a growth moment for me, another chance to challenge these beliefs I’ve held onto for so long.
It was a huge accomplishment to finish the race. It was a challenge. I was hurting badly and the negative thoughts about being a failure came in hard, and without my Mentor Mike J I would’ve given in and given up. I couldn’t have asked for a better pacer, partner, inspiration, support. I’m so grateful to MiMS - coming around that last corner and seeing and hearing all of you guys yelling for me, it was just amazing. It was very emotional to cross the finish line - I cried when I finished. This race, and MiMS, is a life-builder, really. I realized that I can succeed if I put forth the effort and believe in my support system - and myself. Even though my feet hurt so bad today!”
Meet Johnny, Team Nokomis Alumni Member
On June 17, 2023 Team Nokomis Alumni Member Johnny celebrated the completion of his first marathon in Duluth, MN. Johnny’s journey to Mile in My Shoes’ follows a unique path. Already regularly logging 6-8 miles, Johnny joined Team Nokomis - an all-veterans team built in partnership with the nonprofit Every Third Saturday (ETS) - while training for Grandma’s Marathon. “I was going through veteran’s court and they asked me what I was planning to do to stay healthy. I told them I was running and they suggested I join Mile in My Shoes.” Johnny decided that joining MiMS would be a great way to get support with his marathon training and meet his program requirements. This year, however, was actually Johnny’s second time attempting Grandma’s:
“I started really running in 2022 to improve my mental health. I used to play soccer and actually had a soccer scholarship for college, but I ended up going into the military instead. I started running again to occupy my mind and keep it from wandering into the dark thoughts. Training for a marathon was three hours and then coming back I had to stretch and recover and that took three more hours. That was time I was able to keep my mind from wandering. I would run 15 miles from St. Paul to meet with my probation officer.
I live in MAC-V’s Building 47 (a 13-bed residential facility on the Minneapolis VA Medical Center campus providing safe, clean and structured housing to unhoused, single male Veterans). A lot of those men in Building 47 had abused their bodies. They experienced drug and alcohol addiction. That was me, too. I hadn’t worked out after getting out of the military. It was lonely.
One day, while out for a run, I ran into Merv, a friend from Building 47, who asked, ‘You're running?’ He was too - as part of his recovery plan. He was like 270 lbs and needed someone to run with him. So, I started chaperoning him on his runs. After two runs, Merv came to me and said, ‘Have you heard of Grandma’s Marathon? We’re signed up for it!’ I was like, Are you crazy!?
We had 45 days left to train and had not yet even broken a mile running together. So I used to run to meet Merv and then we would run together. Then, I would run back home. One day I looked over my shoulder and noticed that Merv was following me in his car. I realized he was pacing me because he didn’t want me to run alone.
On the day of Grandma’s Marathon 2022, we ran eight miles together. I could tell he was struggling to keep going. He wasn’t going to finish so I made sure to get him in an ambulance and then I kept going. I finished 21 miles and then I stopped. My knees were shot.
I wanted to sign up again this year because I made a promise to myself and my friend that I would finish the marathon. I was running already when I started with MiMS, training for Grandma's Marathon. The Run Mentors knew this and gave me training pointers, encouragement, and some took the extra time to run a few more miles with me after the team runs. Those extra motivational words of encouragement really made the difference in my training and thought process when the real day of running the marathon came. I even voiced about how I didn't have transportation or lodging set up for Grandma's and quietly behind the scenes, people took care of those blind spots for me and things got situated.
Running with MiMS has been a tremendous boost to my recovery. I remember how, at the beginning of March, I was running solo almost every day and thinking, “OMG this is such a lonely sport.” I was more used to the kind of sport that had teammates and oppositional players. In running, the opposition is oneself, the weather, the road conditions, car drivers … and loose dogs!
I remember I couldn't wait for April 19, the first run with the Nokomis Team. Once I started running with MiMS, it reminded me of the days of long ago in the Army where there were 40 of us running in formation … everyone working and supporting each other to finish the run. This new-found sense of team made me want to show up every time to run with the team because not only can I draw upon the energy of the group, but give that same kind of energy back to those that need it.
I’ve always wanted to be there for my friends, my family. That’s part of why I went into the military too. I was born in a war zone. I remember at the age of four, dead bodies being flown in around me. I saw death and destruction. My dad was a CIA trained member of the US Army stationed in Vietnam. I remember hearing his war stories and seeing his military scars. My dad used to have me stand at attention since I was really small.
But my father passed away when I was nine. I had to step up and help raise my brothers and sisters. I always knew I was different than the other kids. I had to grow up fast and I started rebelling against societal norms - and not in a positive way. I thought with my fists. They used to call me ‘Black Wolf’. Even though I was smart, I had a hard time fitting in and we moved often, switching schools every year.
When I graduated high school, I married my high school sweetheart. I had an offer to attend college in La Crosse, Wisconsin but did not accept it. I was the oldest child, and I don’t think my mom really understood the offer and what it could be. A week after turning down the scholarship, I signed the papers to join the Army. For me, it was a way to take control of what I experienced as a kid. I enlisted as a medic. I knew when I joined the Army that I didn’t want to join the combat side of things - I didn’t want to cause any more death.
After completing basic service, I attended Army Advanced Individual Training (AIT) School at Fort Sam Houston and earned an EMT certification. I was the top of my class. That experience helped me grow up, learn discipline, and respect the uniform. I watched the last three graduation groups get deployed and I was ready. There were 300 of us. We had the going to war mentality and were all going above and beyond because we were thinking, ‘He might be working on me’.
I was disappointed that I didn’t get deployed to Iraq. I went to Ft. Carson to work as part of the medical detachment team. There, I trained as an air assault medic and made it my goal to learn the records of the hundreds of military service men and women serving in the engineer battalion.
For me, transitioning out of the Army, it took about six or seven months before I was able to fully incorporate back into civilian life. My challenge when I first got out was getting up early and wondering, what do I do? Looking at the uniforms that were still hung there and then looking at my civilian clothes and putting them back on. Trying to just say, “ok, that’s done”.
For the last 10 years, it has been hard for me to do what I used to do for my family. I used to be the one my siblings depended on but it has been a struggle and I need to focus on getting myself better. My mom is my inspiration. She came to the United States in 1977 and didn’t start speaking English until the late 80s. She is now an important part of the Hmong community, running her own business and leading Hmong New Year celebrations as Chairman of the Ball. I have a deep appreciation for how much she has worked my whole life. She’s strong. I want to live up to her reputation.
My goals now are to keep my running lifestyle. I want to keep training and pushing myself forward to stay healthy. I will also promote and recruit other veterans to run with Team Nokomis with the hopes that it might influence them to start a healthy lifestyle as well.”
Next up, Johnny will be racing the @twincitiesinmotion 10 Mile as a FundRacer for MiMS! In lieu of linking to his personal venmo as a thanks for sharing his story, Johnny asks that if you’d like to support his success you can donate to his FundRacing campaign - thank you!
Meet Bill, Team Southside Resident Member
“Why are you smiling?”
On a recent Tuesday morning run at Team Southside, this was Resident Member Bill’s response to the Question of the Day: “What question do people always ask you?”
“I tell them I am smiling because I am so happy to be here. To be alive, to be free, to be with all of you. I have my whole life ahead of me.”
At age 56, it could be considered unusual to feel as though your whole life is ahead of you. But for Bill, who spent the past 16 years in prison, these past few weeks in the halfway house have been the start of a whole new life. He is, he believes, a completely different person than the man who went in nearly two decades ago. The person he is today has never been alive in this world, a whole new world to him. And that concept has him at one excited, grateful, and filled with anxiety.
“I was not a good person. In fact I was a horrible human being. I walked all over people. But I also lost everyone. My parents were great, but I was adopted, and to be honest that really messed with me. I always felt … off, different. When I was a young man, just turned 18, I met my birth mother - and I also met two half-siblings, children that she kept. I knew one of them! This was extremely hard for me - yes, she told me she couldn’t afford to keep me, and it’s true they grew up much poorer than I had. But I would’ve rather had that than to be the one pushed aside, given away. I had a lot of anger about that, anger I didn’t deal with in a healthy way.
I was a high school dropout, but I worked my way up to becoming a very successful businessman. I started out racing cars in my youth, and that lead to being a car salesman, and then I kept rising up. By age 32 I had started my own company. I let my ego drive me, and I made a lot of enemies. I was a jerk, and I walked all over people, and I lost my business contacts and my friends. The breaking point was when I was asked to speak at a conference, and when I got up to speak people walked out. Everyone hated me.
I hesitate to share this, because I still struggle with people’s opinion of me. But I think it’s important to share, especially when it comes to mental health. I hit a low point, and I tried to commit suicide. Unfortunately, my attempt didn’t hurt just me, it hurt other people, and I can’t ever take that back. And as a result, I received a twenty year prison sentence.
My sentence began in 2007. I decided on day one to improve myself - working out, learning a trade - but the truth is I was still an asshole. I was playing tough guy. It wasn’t until 2016 that I really changed. I had a friend who was going to be singing at Christmas mass, so I decided to go - to heckle him, really. But that night at chapel something just changed inside me. I was always the guy who said “I didn’t come to prison to find God,” but that night he found me. That is when things really changed for me.
A few years later, we had a chance to hear a victim’s family talk about the impact the crime had had on their lives, and when they were done speaking I asked them if there was anything someone like me could do to make things better. One of the family members told me that I could share my own story with others in hopes that it would make a difference, and at that point I decided I would do what I could to talk to as many people I could.
When I was preparing to be released from prison I was armed with a lot of misinformation and I was prepared for the worst. The only thing you know about the outside when you are in comes from people who have left prison, and then returned. So many guys return, and their experience in the outside world wasn’t good - so they spread a lot of negativity and fear. “No one will help you out there.” You don’t hear from the guys who made it.
My experience of reentry, so far, has had its ups and downs - there are certainly challenges - but I have found that the world is less scary, and that people are more willing to help me and accept me than I anticipated. So I started a blog about my experience mainly for all the guys still inside who think the world out here will be awful to them. I want to give them hope where I didn’t have much. I will keep it real, share my struggles but also the so many wonderful, positive things I have found. I hope this blog not only gives hope to the men still in prison, but also helps people who have never been to prison better understand what reentry is like.
What has helped my reentry the most? Faith, my mentor, Mile in My Shoes. I have embraced MiMS as my family. I couldn’t imagine doing this without you all.”
Please check out Bill’s blog on his reentry experience here and share with others - inside and out!
Meet Bri, Team Challenge Alumni Member
On June 4th, 2022, the atmosphere was already abuzz when Bri, a Team Challenge Resident Member, took center stage to lead hundreds of Downtown Run Around participants in the MiMS group warmup. She wasn’t nervous, though - as a Team Captain she was well-versed in the routine and used to pumping up her teammates, both in running and getting through life’s challenges: “I’ve been telling the girls it’s like treading water. You just can’t stop. That’s what this life is. I remind myself that I’ve been through way harder things.”
“I had a relatively normal childhood in rural Minnesota. Close family, and I was into sports - gymnastics, track and field, soccer, all the things. But when I was 15, I started dating an older guy and sneaking around. The relationship changed a lot of things for me very quickly.
My boyfriend sold drugs, gave me alcohol - it was just a lot more than I bargained for. But I was a teenage girl in love, so I went along with it. Then one weekend, my boyfriend and his friends broke into some cabins and were caught by the police. I was along and considered an accomplice and, as a minor, I was sent to a ‘girls’ home’. I called my boyfriend and begged him to come and get me out, and he hung up on me. I was devastated. I loved him, and he made me feel worthless. That’s around when I developed an eating disorder.
Strictly controlling my eating was a way to deal with my problems. I had lost control of everything else. I was defeated, and I had no self-worth. I stopped feeling hunger for what it was, I didn’t know how to enjoy food - this would go on for 15 years. When I returned home after nine months, I went back to my boyfriend, and right back into everything. I was partying and I started doing drugs. But honestly, the eating disorder was still the most detrimental to me, because it was easier to hide.
I managed to graduate from high school and start college, but I was still living with my boyfriend and now we were selling drugs to other college kids. At 19, we got busted by the police - I now had a record. Two months later I found out I was pregnant.
My baby girl motivated me to be healthy, even before she was born. I broke up with her father and quit smoking, drinking, and I was actually eating regularly. For almost five years it was just me and her, making our way together.
When she was five, I started dating someone who was addicted to painkillers. Just like an eating disorder, painkillers can provide a distraction - pushing down those feelings of not being good enough. I felt such relief the first time - I wasn’t thinking about food or eating anymore. I’d been prescribed them in the past when I got my wisdom teeth removed, so I didn’t think of them the way I did other drugs. But I had gone on a trip with my family and after a few days I got so sick, and I didn’t know why. I called my boyfriend and he said well yeah, you’re addicted to painkillers and you are withdrawing. In that moment my world shattered. Any motivation or goals pushing me forward was gone. I should’ve told my family - things could have been different. But shame keeps you quiet.
For awhile, I managed to keep my life together enough while using the painkillers. But it was to the point where I was spending almost thousands each month on painkillers, so I started selling to keep up my habit. You know, you get on this train you never meant to get on, and now you’re going 100 miles an hour and it feels like if you try to jump off you will die. My life was at the point where the pain of my reality, it seemed, outweighed the pain of living the life of an addict. When you use drugs, you’re just trying to prolong your existence at that moment. You are desperate to get out of the spot you are at. I would use [drugs], go to bed, wake up in withdrawal, and use again.
I wanted to quit so badly - I moved home, away from my boyfriend, but addiction follows you everywhere you go. And the way I saw the world had changed. Being numb, pushing all of the horrible feelings down. I would struggle to stay sober, try to be happy and keep people around so I wouldn’t be alone. Not understanding what’s missing, and trying to be a mom at the same time. I lost my daughter, went back to jail, started using heroin and then meth. My world had crumbled and I couldn’t crawl out.
In 2018, I ended up getting a virus in my heart from shooting up bad meth and I was in a coma for over a month. I should’ve died. After I awoke, I couldn’t walk - and I was facing eleven felony charges. This was a new level of low. I was in the hospital for four and a half months learning how to walk again, but also shooting up [in the hospital]. I shot heroin the day I got out. But I got to the point where the drugs didn’t get me high anymore. You don’t believe the day will come, but it did. I had this revelation moment, this epiphany where God was like “Are you serious?” The next day I entered treatment.
I had a lot of work to do. I had a walker, and not having my legs was a big deal. I had to prove to myself that I wasn’t going to die being out in the world. I wasn’t sure my legs would ever work again. But I did a lot of work there, physically and mentally. I started to experience things like joy. I hadn’t realized that I hadn’t had that before. I didn’t know that the eating disorder, and then the drugs, had wiped that from my life. There were relapses, and the joy was stolen for awhile. But I always knew I wanted that back.
When I got to Teen Challenge, it took a long time to believe that people would want to be my friend. I joined Mile in My Shoes because I didn’t have a healthy relationship with working out, I was very unkind to my body and I was very unkind to myself, overall. Getting out there took a lot of self-talk and I really had to give myself a lot of grace. The mental battle with that is real, because one of the biggest triggers for women is their body. So when I was given the opportunity to do MiMS, that was a really healthy way for me to learn how to cope with things. I probably scared some of the Mentors because I would be struggling and distraught and I can remember just yelling!
During MiMS runs I learned to talk through things. I never used to go on runs and talk with people! I thought, absolutely not. But through it, I learned that I could make friends that aren’t addicts. It was the first time that I tried to have a real conversation with someone who didn’t live the same life that I did.
Being on the team gave me a sense of something to look forward to and something that was consistent in my life. We went no matter what was happening. We ran in sleet and I was screaming at God. And I struggled. Running the Drumstick Dash last year, it was so cold. My mask froze to my face. But I did it. Those moments of accomplishment, they were reminders that I could overcome. I can do better than I think I can, I don’t have to be the person everyone has labeled me as. And in that environment, where it was all of us mixed together and no one was treated differently than any other - it was a big deal.
I guess there’s always been something inside of me that wants better. My daughter is also a big reason why I haven’t given up. Being away from my daughter is hard. I know what I have to do, but it’s hard.
I’ve learned to appreciate people who’ve been through a lot. They’re like gifts. I know I can reach some kinds of people that someone else couldn’t because I’ve been through different things - that’s why I want to be an Alumni Mentor.
Running was really good for my mental health. There’s power in the camaraderie that comes with accomplishing things. Even if it’s a run around the block, it’s still an accomplishment. And doing it with other people - the community is really important. When I went running for the first time with MiMS, it was not for my mental health benefit, it was for fear of gaining weight. But I stopped that. I slowed down. I started to show up because I was struggling and working through things while running. It taught me that it could be a coping tool - and a community - instead of what I thought it would be. Now I love to encourage other people because I remember being at a point where I couldn’t get up two stairs and how awful that feels. But that’s why I love the pace of MiMS - everyone going at their speed, and you just feel included. No matter where you’re at. I have found joy.”
Bri is currently enrolled in Minnesota Adult and Teen Challenge’s Leadership Academy, where she hopes to be a director one day. If you’d like to support her goals financially you can give to her directly on CashApp, username $Brimattson. Thank you for sharing with our community Bri, and special thanks to Run Mentor Kelly McLaughlin for interviewing her for this profile.
If you or a loved one are struggling with an eating disorder you can reach out to The Emily Program: https://www.emilyprogram.com/
If you or a loved one are struggling with an addiction to painkillers or any substances, some resources include:
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Hotline: https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline
Hazledon/Betty Ford: https://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/
MN Recovery Connection: https://minnesotarecovery.org/
Meet “Byrd”, Team Roseville Resident Member
Two weeks ago, Robert “Byrd” Cindrich completed something he’d never even heard of just a year ago - The City of Lakes half marathon, a 13.1 mile race. “When my team first brought up running a half marathon this spring, I didn’t even grasp the concept of it. Run 13 miles? What is that … or better yet, why would anyone do that?” A Resident Member of Team Roseville since he came out of prison this April, being part of Mile in My Shoes has introduced Byrd to people and ideas he didn’t even have an awareness of when, at age 23, he was sentenced to thirty years in prison.
“I grew up in St. Paul and got into street life pretty early. By fifteen I was a ‘frontliner’, and constantly having to prove myself. Once you are ‘in’, it’s pretty hard to get out. It becomes your life, your family. For many people it’s their only family. But, you’re always having to watch your back. I’ve been shot, and was lucky I survived.
By the time I was twenty I had two daughters and a son on the way, and I knew this life was not something I could continue forever. I started getting into cars - buying them at auctions, fixing them up and selling them. It wasn’t as lucrative but it as legit, and I felt good about working at something honest and getting out of my past life. I could relax a little.
One night, the brother of my girlfriend was in trouble - he’d gotten jumped and needed help. He was family, so I went to help him, and ended up fighting the guy, and unfortunately, that person unintentionally passed away.
I didn’t try to fight it - I took a plea deal for 17 years, but the judge ended up giving me 30 years. I was 22 years old. I’d never been to prison. I didn’t even have a concept of what 30 years meant or what was ahead of me.
Going to prison was like growing up in the streets all over again. Inside, I was involved with a lot of the same people I’d known on the outside. Getting back in it with them, it gave me a sense of purpose and belonging. I was a frontliner again inside just like I had been on the outside. I was being tested all the time. I probably spent a total of three full years in segregation, not allowed to leave my cell for anything. I was young, I had 30 years to do which seemed like a lifetime.
I did decide, though, that I was going to take this time to educate myself. I started working on my GED, and got into classes in carpentry and cabinetry, and achieved several certifications. I started cutting people’s hair, and ended up getting my barber’s certificate which was a year and a half program.
In April of this year I was released to the re-entry center to complete my last year. Being in a halfway house, in the “in between” is really difficult. You’re not in but you’re not out. And wow, a lot has changed in 20 years. Everyone is on their phones now. What is acceptable and what is not has changed so much. I see people from my old neighborhood and it motivates me to do better. So, I continue to build my new circle in regards, to moving along in life.
I ran a bit in prison but always just a few miles. When I started running with this team, I was struck by the camaraderie right away. But more than that, this team gave me a sense of something new - a sense of a new way of living. For the half [marathon] I ran with Glenn and Kate, and did you know they are scientists?? And we were cool with one another and I’m like whoa, this is NOT who I would’ve been friends with before. This is completely different for me.
This past weekend, I ran a half marathon, which I would never have considered doing before. But the Mentors told me I was a strong runner, and then [fellow Resident] Robert, he was like I’m an old man, I can’t do this but you can - go out there and get it. This old guy’s telling me I gotta do it so I had to!
Because of running with Mile in My Shoes, I was able to get connected with Stilo Cutz, where I work now as a barber. When I needed the tools to start, you connected me to Small Sums to get what I needed. My life is so different now. Now I don’t stay out late because I gotta go home - I gotta work or run in the morning. It feels good to not be always looking over your shoulder.
I brag about Mile in My Shoes to people. I have a 22 year old son, and I am going to get him to come to a run with me soon, to show him this different way. I know you say this organization isn’t big, but damn …. I sure feel like I’m a part of something big.”
Interested in helping Byrd reach his goals? You can support him by contributing to him directly on CashApp, where his profile is: $Juniorcrich.
Meet Danny, Team Sally/Distance Crew Alumni Member
On a recent rainy Saturday morning, Alumni Member Danny showed up to the MiMS Distance Crew meeting spot with a smile, but also some uncertainty. A recent injury was causing some nerves - he was training with his team for the Twin Cities Marathon, would he be able to complete the mileage? Completing a marathon had been his dream for a year, ever since completing the City of Lakes Half Marathon with his Team Sally teammates in 2021. Now that dream was close to being realized, if he could just be smart about his training and keep himself healthy. But being smart about his health is a pretty new practice for Danny. In fact, up until last spring Danny had been a daily drug or alcohol user for 10 years - since he was 17 years old.
“At school, I was mostly under the influence or getting high. When I did stay sober for a 3-4 day stretch, that was always followed by increased alcohol use. By 2018, I was homeless - drinking everyday, and shooting meth to cope with being on the streets in the Minnesota winter. One day I missed the shot - meaning that I went to use the IV but didn’t actually get the substance in my vein - and developed an abscess and infection in my arm. I had to have emergency surgery, and the surgeon who operated on me told me that I was lucky I didn’t have to have my arm amputated. It was in this moment, for the first time, that I admitted that I needed help.
I entered a treatment program and ended up at the Salvation Army for aftercare, but my mind wasn’t ready and I immediately fell back off [the wagon]. Six months later I had my second major hospitalization - I was depressed and tried to kill myself by injecting bleach with an IV. I was in the ICU for 5 days, and was committed by the State of Minnesota to inpatient treatment. But my mind still wasn’t ready. I left Minnesota and went back home to Maryland. I actually got closer to my Mom during this time, but she ultimately told me to leave if I was going to continue using. After nearly drinking myself to death, I decided again that I needed help - that’s when I called the Salvation Army again and moved back to Minnesota last spring.
Soon after I arrived at ‘the Sally’ I heard about Mile in My Shoes and I joined as soon as the team started. I joined for the opportunity to be around people outside of the guys in the program, for a positive community. The running was secondary. MiMS gave me a lifeline to feel like a normal person and find a new passion as well as a healthier lifestyle and a group of dear friends. MiMS is about so much more than the running to me - it’s about a place to grow and laugh with other people.
I graduated from the Salvation Army program last fall, but pretty quickly relapsed. Fortunately, it didn’t take me as long this time to realize that this life wasn’t worth it anymore. I went right back into the program. I had continued to run throughout my relapse knowing how important it had become in my recovery, but learned it has to be in combination with other good habits to keep me sober.
I’ve accepted where I’m at, and know that association with people who don’t get me back into old habits is critical to my recovery. I’ve been told my whole life that I don’t listen, but that’s not true. I just don’t always act on it. I’ve learned that I need a plan and a goal and a support system to hold me accountable. I recently completed my GED, and my goal is to become a Certified Nursing Assistant. I’m learning to listen to my Sponsor and my support group, including my teammates at MiMS, to do the best thing for me right now.
This spring I decided to join the MiMS Distance Crew and train for 26.2 I knew that it was a crazy long race, but how long didn’t hit me until [my training partner] and I were talking earlier this season about my race pace and the 4 hour range. FOUR hours of running…that’s a lot! But I know that I can do it. I told myself that I would listen and follow the plan this time, and so far the best part about being on this team is the positivity, the support, and the coaching and advice from everyone.
As I think about marathon race day, I’m most looking forward to getting it done, to finishing 26.2 miles. Finishing this race will prove to myself that with a goal and with the right support system, I can do things that I once felt were impossible. I’ve recently reconnected with my Mom, and she’s been telling everyone around her office about my marathon training. She’s proud of me. We’ve found a peace between us that didn’t exist for most of my adult life.
This past week, I graduated from the Salvation Army program for a second time. This time I feel excited and like my mind is ready. I never thought I’d ever change and rid myself of this monkey on my back and be free of the depression that held me close for so long - but there is help for these troubles if we reach out and get vulnerable, there is hope.”
On October 2nd, 2022 Danny will celebrate 234 days sober by completing 26.2 miles at the Twin Cities Marathon - WOO!
Meet Antonyo, Team Southside Resident Member
On a recent Tuesday morning, Team Southside Resident Member Antonyo was awarded a new running jacket as thanks for recruiting a group of new Members from inside the reentry center. After accepting the jacket, he turned to address the new runners: “It is great to see all of you new guys out here, you bring a great energy. But, I also want to see you all out here in a few weeks, a few months. Things [in your life] will start to get more difficult, and it might get harder to stick with this. If you need to take a break for a day, then take a day. Don’t take a month. This group will be the biggest support you have over the next few months. When I started a few months ago, I was walking most of the time. Now I am running most of the time. These people are here to walk with you, or do whatever you need to do. So do yourselves a favor and stick with Mile in My Shoes.”
Antonyo joined Team Southside in April, and completed his first 5K at the Downtown Run Around in June. Now an Alumni, Antonyo, a natural leader, is at the heart of this team. As he grows in his own running, he’s become a guide for other new Members.
“For me, growing up was rough. I had no father figure. My mom was a full-blown addict. This was the 80s and early 90s, in the middle of the crack epidemic. I have four younger siblings, I was the oldest, and we moved around alot. My mom, though, she always made sure we had what we needed - housing, clothes, food - we were never on the streets. We may not have had what we wanted, but we had what we needed. I never felt like I was on the backburner.
I started selling drugs by the time I was ten. My mom knew, but she wasn’t in a position to do anything about it. I developed a reputation pretty early on - set myself apart because I was willing to do whatever it took. When you grow up with anger, you do what needs to be done without thinking about the consequences, without remorse even. I had my first gun at 13.
When I was a young teenager, I started doing something - I started just calling people randomly in the phone book. I’d just opened a page, point to a number and call. From maybe age 12 to 17. I just needed someone to talk to, honestly, and it’s easier to talk to someone that you don’t know. People would pick up the phone and I’d just ask them if they’d mind listening to me, I needed to get some stuff off my chest. Some people would want to meet me, maybe they wanted to help, but I didn’t do that. Some would just tell me to keep my head up. Kids just need someone to listen to them. That’s why I want to work with youth - I know what would’ve helped me when I was young. My probation officers, they gave me a lot of speeches, but they never really listened.
I was in and out of juvenile “camps” and programs a lot as a teenager. When I was 15, I left St. Paul and went to Peoria, IL - I ran, basically, from the cops after an incident - to where I’d discovered my dad lived. I’d had no contact with my father, but I had no place else to go. You know what my dad asked me when I got there, after all this time? He said ‘I heard you’ve been selling weed. You got some for me?’ That really hurt me.
I went from selling drugs to trafficking drugs across state lines to guns. I never used drugs, except for weed - I saw what it did to my mom, aunties, even my grandma - so I did well. I didn’t have the problems that so many others have. I was selling for the rush, for the money. I was addicted to the money the way that others are addicted to the drugs. I bought all the things I didn’t have as a kid. I bought my first house at 16 - in cash, no deed, I didn’t know anything about that, I didn’t know any better.
At 18, I had my first daughter. This made me wonder if I should quit. But at this point, I was able to buy things that my family never had. What was my other option? I wouldn’t have even had the first idea how to go about getting a job. I only knew one way of life. People can go so quickly from good to bad, you know? In an instant. But it doesn’t work the other way around.
As I got older, nothing really changed - I only started to get in worse trouble. The cops knew my first and last name. My life became always having to look over my shoulder - it’s the worst feeling in the world. I had other children by now, and I’d gotten tired of being targeted. I’d done well enough, so I stopped selling anything but weed. But, the police considered me a public risk, and a high-speed chase in 2008 ended in a sentence of 7 years.
I was locked up at 29 years old. The day I entered prison, I told myself I was done. When I get out, no more drugs, no more guns. I committed to becoming better, to changing my life. I had been addicted to the streets, to the lifestyle. I had respect from the streets. But now I wanted respect from myself.
Prison was like walking into a whole other world. I had to do it, but I would not recommend it! Federal prison was more dangerous [than state] - we were really told right away we had to fend for ourselves. Prison was also very segregated, which was new for me. Promoting racism is a way to keep control, to keep groups pitted against one another - that way they won’t cooperate. So in prison all these years, I was only around other Blacks. People would never run together like we do here [at Mile in My Shoes] on the inside. Running with our team now gives me hope. Often I am the only Black person running in our group. But do I feel strange? No, because unlike many people out there, the people in this group are not judging me by my skin but by my character. People who care about getting to know ME, and what I think about things.
Mile in My Shoes has been a big change for me. Not just the running, but being around people who really don’t understand what it’s like to be me or be from where I am from - but who want to know me. I love running with the team because it’s all these professional people who care and don’t judge. I mean, what makes Run Mentors wake up in the morning and say “Let’s see if we can get some convicts out here to run with us?” Y’all treat everyone the same. You don’t just give some people hugs, you give every person hugs.
My teammates have been really patient with me as I set and slowly reach my goals. I never ran in prison. But, I’ve been running all my life - from issues, from problems. I even ran from help. Now I’m running to feel good.
I had hoped to train with some of my teammates for the (City of Lakes) half marathon - I would love to achieve that distance, and with y’all, I know I could. But recently, I picked up more hours at work and so I had to give up the training. I’ll keep it 100 with you - going back to the streets is NOT an option for me. And so I have to work a lot so that I can first own my own car, then own a house - things I was never able to do the right way before this. I just recently passed my test and got my driver’s license. My plan is to work hard so that I can get promoted and get better pay. Then I’ll be able to relax and take more time for things that will keep me happy & healthy - and I’ll be back for that half marathon next year!
I was a dangerous individual at one time - I was angry at the world. But there's no such thing as a ‘hardened criminal’ - that’s an image. I had to let go of my image. Now I’m living a life I never lived before, and it feels good. I’m proud of myself! I want to give back what I’ve taken from society. I can never replace all I’ve taken, but I’m gonna try.”
Interested in helping Antonyo in reaching his goals? You can support him by contributing to him directly on CashApp, where his profile (named for his two grandkid’s nicknames) is: $badbabypacman
Meet Tom, Alumni Mentor and Team Coach, Team Sally
An early morning in May, Alumni Member and Team Coach Tom addressed the Members of Team Sally, gathered in a circle around him: “Remember on your run today - compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not who someone else is today. And this applies to running and recovery. If I start looking at others, well that’s when it gets easy to start drinking again. If I look back to a year ago, I was literally suicidal. And look where I am today. That’s big. Only compare yourself to yourself. Now let’s go!” The crowd of twenty or so gathers around him, counts down “3-2-1 Mile in My Shoes WOO!” and takes off running down 10th street towards the river.
Tom is an Alumni Member of Team Sally, and this spring became both a Run Mentor as well as the first MiMS Alumni Member to become a member of the “Core Team” - the leadership team that runs each team site - when he became the team coach. The group of Members he now coaches are in a very similar place to where he was one year ago, when he was a client at Salvation Army Adult Rehabilitation Center, aka “the Sally”.
“I’m a valedictorian college dropout alcoholic welder. I had a normal youth, other than that I never felt like I fit in. I was always labeled the ‘smart kid’ - I got a score of 31 on my ACTs - but I was actually a complete moron about the world, when it came to a lot of things that matter. I started drinking in high school because it helped me feel like I fit in. Because of my grades, it was always just assumed I would go to college - I never considered another option. But things got worse when I got to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. I was supposed to pick a major, but nothing appealed to me, nothing excited me. I hated sitting in classes, I had no direction. I was drinking maybe 12-18 beers a day, and I had started hiding my drinking at this point. Drinking culture was prevalent, but I was still worried about people knowing how much I actually drank. I started staying in my room and drinking all day, and things got so bad I eventually dropped out.
My brother was a crane operator for a company that erected grain elevators, so I went to work with him. It was very intimidating - all these big men doing a trade I knew nothing about. I was out of my comfort zone. But after a year of proving myself, they made me a foreman. While working there, I was living out of a hotel room roughly seven months a year, drinking excessively every day. I managed to function well enough, though, and this went on for about four years. I was in a relationship at that time, and we had a son named Kai. I was offered a job as a Project Manager around then, and since I wanted to be able to provide for and spend time with him, I took it even though it was an office job. Things in the relationship weren’t great, and I stupidly thought if we had a kid, or we had a house, or if I got her a car, things would be fixed. I could throw money at it, instead of dealing with the problems.
It was a big mistake. I like to move around and do shit with my hands. Around this time I switched from beer to vodka, and my relationship ended. I had another short-lived relationship - we even went to Vegas and got married - but things were going downhill fast. I told my job I needed time off to address my drinking, and that became more time. I sold my house. My marriage was over by the beginning of 2019 (4 months after getting married), I moved in with my mom, was depressed and drank all day long. I didn’t even want to get better at that point - I wanted it to end. I even bought two guns with a plan to kill myself (my mom had found the first one), but I was too afraid. I wish I could tell you I didn’t do it because of my kid but I can’t - I was just too afraid I wouldn’t do it right. I finally ended up in the hospital, where a counselor came and told me about the Sally. So I decided to go. I followed the program and the rules, but my heart wasn’t in it - I wasn’t ready. Two months after I completed, I was drinking again.
I went back and tried again, but this only lasted a few months. At this point, there was a conversation about giving up the rights to my son and my brother was progressing well in life. I was jealous of his success. I left with plans to have one last hurrah before killing myself, only to find myself alone in a hotel room, drunk and miserable. I went to stay with my mom when my plan fell through. Once at my mom's, I could only fall asleep by fantasizing about ways to kill myself- that was how I found any semblance of peace. My mom finally said “This has to change, you need to do something.” So I went back to the Sally a few days before Christmas - no way was I gonna make it through Christmas at home. This time, something clicked. I got a good sponsor and started practicing gratitude. I accepted the spiritual aspect of recovery. I stopped comparing myself to others. I had been meaning to start working out but couldn’t find motivation. Then I heard about Mile in My Shoes, how a team was about to open at the Sally. I needed the external accountability, so I decided to join.
I’ve listened to podcasts about ultrarunners, and the mental benefits that come from running - the mental strength to break through walls and all of that. I’d never been a runner or an athlete of any sort. Hated running with a passion! But I joined because I knew I needed the emotional benefits, and it turned out I just hated running alone - I needed other people.
Not one person in the Mile in My Shoes group had a bad attitude, that’s what I recall the most about starting - everyone was so positive. When you are in a residential rehab program, it sort of feels like you are not even part of society. Getting to go out and run with “normal” people was a big deal. I would tell people about my past, about being an alcoholic, and not a single person ever responded negatively. I’ve struggled my whole life with other’s perceptions of me - I’m working on that - but I want to live an honest life. It’s helped me to be a more honest person, and now I’ve been open with others, like at my brother’s wedding, because by being open I have the potential to help others.
I’m a firm believer that the physical and mental are connected. After I run, my mind is calmer and clearer. I operate better, and have significantly more energy. And when you’ve run 5 miles in the morning before the rest of the guys have even gotten up, well, I’ve already won the day! That’s a huge sense of accomplishment. Doing hard things makes you feel so much better.
I decided to become a mentor because I am a firm believer that responsibility adds meaning to life. I was a selfish prick when I was an alcoholic. “Raise your self esteem by doing esteemable acts.” The conversations are a bit different now that I run with Members, but it’s not that different - we are all just people. The focus is just less on me and more on them now.
This role is a natural way for me to serve others. I plan to be a part of Mile in My Shoes for a long time. I’m now also a sponsor to four other addicts/alcoholics. Helping others is one of the main ways I stay sober.
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“Tom's openness and honesty helps create a space where members and mentors alike know that our runs are times where it's okay to be reflective, vulnerable, and to share personal experiences . Opening up can feel like a big risk, and so when other members see that the experiences Tom shares are heard without judgment, it helps build trust across the team.” - Team Sally Resident Manager Mel
“I can't articulate how effective Tom is with his words, his manner, his experience. He is humble, yet confident. He is an amazing role model for the guys on the team. His tips every week are definitely not just about running - they are about recovery and life.” - Team Leader Kerri
“Tom has a very spiritual foundation for both life and his recovery program through lots of hard work and trial and error … he is a living example of the miracles of recovery. We could not have a better life and running coach for our team! - Team Leader Ruth
Meet Waylon, Resident Member, Team Centre
What team do you run with?
Team Centre, MiMS’ newest team at a reentry center for people exiting incarceration located in Fargo, ND.
How did you find yourself at Centre?
I came to Fargo from Las Vegas, my hometown, three years ago to try and reestablish a relationship with my two little boys (now age 8 and 10) who had moved here with their mom. I’d been an absent father their whole lives, and using drugs honestly made it easy to become and then stay uninvolved. I’ve been an addict since I was a teenager. I was not on a good path in Vegas - headed towards prison or death, really - and after a brush with a jail sentence, I called my boys’ mom up and asked her if I came to Fargo, if she would help me to get back on my feet. I stole scrap metal to pay for my bus ticket to get here - I was determined to turn things around in a new place. I realize now that while I had it in my head to do right, I didn’t have the tools to do it. After just a few weeks here I was back using, and she got hooked again as well. Eventually, my boys were placed in foster care and to make a long story short, the next few years were spent getting treatment, getting the kids back, and then returning to the spiral of addiction, burglary, etc. I've had a really difficult time breaking this cycle of addiction, depression and criminal activity. This past March I violated parole and was sent to prison, and released to Centre in June of this year.
When I was sent to prison in March, I was at a very low point. My brother had just passed away, I’d lost my kids again, and my girlfriend Jyssica was pregnant and I knew I’d not be able to be there for her or maybe even the baby. I’d ballooned to over 300 pounds, and I was not comfortable in my own skin. For awhile I simply succumbed to depression. I was afraid I might lose Jyssica and my daughter and I was determined to not let that happen - I knew I needed to do something different, but I needed help. Then, I met two guys in prison who helped me start turning things around. They worked out, and they convinced me to start, too. They dragged me out, and were supportive and encouraging - they made me feel good about who I was and wanted to become, and they didn’t let up. We measured out this tiny circle to run around - you had to run around it so many times to make even one mile, 5280 feet - like 100 times! That’s how I started running. One mile turned into two turned into three, and my weight started to come off. They serve pretty much only carbs in prison, but I would trade people anything I had for their vegetables. There was nothing to do in there but exercise, and it was the best way I could’ve spent my time.
So it was an easy decision to join Mile in My Shoes?
Well, by the time the MiMS team started up at Centre, I’d been here for a few months and had more or less stopped running completely. I’d started smoking again as soon as I got out, and my health started to really backslide. I saw the fliers posted for the group, but it was my case manager Jason who convinced me to try it. So I decided to join, because running had been my getaway, my time to focus on myself.
Was the team what you expected?
Right away I was a bit thrown because we were told not to come out with earbuds, that the team was about talking to one another, and that made me nervous because I’d always run with music. But in prison you’re running around in tiny baby laps, no scenery or ups and downs or people. Running with MiMS out in the world is totally different. But very soon I got to know people like Dave - I told him during one of our first runs that I wanted to run a half marathon by the time my daughter was born, and he shows up at the next run with this training plan he’s written out for me. That man thought about me, and took out his time for me, and he didn’t have to. I thought, “I’m just an inmate. Just a felon.” He didn’t have to do that for me, and that made a big impression.
Has being part of the team changed you?
I can’t even express to you how much this has changed my life. The change in my confidence and self image - I mean, I talk better, think better, I have better hygiene, I’ve become pro-social. I’m now the supervisor at my job, and I’ve helped a MiMS teammate get a job where I work. It has really changed everything. When people see me running with MiMS, they come up to me and ask me about it. They can’t believe I was recently 300 pounds. I have gotten other people to join the group. I’ve become the person for others what those two fellow inmates were for me.
When we are out running, people honk their horns and it feels crazy to be a part of this group doing something so good and healthy. This whole pro social thing has changed my life. Without running I would not be successful, I would not be hanging out with all these positive people. Some of these mentors know my life at this point, and they root me on. Honestly I think MiMS is going to help me get paroled sooner. I don’t really have bad days anymore. I have bad moments, but not days, thanks to running. I still have to get my boys back, and I now believe I will be successful.
Is there a specific goal you are proud of achieving?
I just got my ten run shirt - that was a very big deal for me, a big milestone. I actually gave it to my girlfriend to put away for me because I don’t want nothing happening to that shirt! When I get to the Thanksgiving Day race, it will be my teammates who get me across the finish line. I lean on them. The guys who finish a run first, they circle back and run me in. They come and get me. That means so much to me. I substitute MiMS for drugs now. People notice a glow about me, and it’s because of this. When I leave Centre, I will be coming back to run and this is what is going to keep me successful this time. This is the best choice I’ve ever made in my life - well, this and staying off of Facebook haha.
Anything else you want to say?
Will you mail me a copy of this story? I want to put it in my daughter’s baby book. I am very proud of where I am at.
Meet Frizell, Team Higher Ground Minneapolis Alumni
Frizell started running with Mile in My Shoes in the summer of 2019, a few months after arriving at Higher Ground Minneapolis. His consistent presence, big smile and enthusiasm for his teammates quickly made him the de-facto team captain. Since March of this year, Frizell has been residing at a hotel in Bloomington, where he and other aged 60+ Higher Ground guests were moved due to Covid-19 concerns. Frizell “sat down” with Run Mentor Laura B. in the week following the murder of George Floyd by Minneapolis police to discuss the realities of Covid, racial injustice, and his experience with MiMS.
Note: You will notice that the term “Negro” is used throughout this article, which is the term used and preferred by Frizell. Out of respect for how Frizell self-identifies and to retain the authenticity of his words, MiMS made the decision to retain his wording.
Laura: This has been a really stressful week, on top of a bunch of stressful weeks with the quarantine. How are you doing?
Frizell: I’m doing good. Really can’t complain. I went three miles this morning, and it was good. Moving every day keeps my blood pressure normal and that’s very good.
Where are you living?
Right now I’m living at the Holiday Inn in Bloomington. I was living at the Higher Ground shelter but [because of Covid-19] they moved me to the hotel because I’m over 60 years old. I’ll tell you this, never let a crisis go to waste. They’ve got these hotels, the hospitality industry is gone, so these hotels still carry their official names but Hennepin County is housing us in the hotel. We get meals, maid service once a week, we get literally the same service that a hotel guest would receive. There are 200 rooms here and all the rooms are full.
I’m out here in Bloomington so I’m good. I don’t have to worry about everything happening on the street. We’re in a very safe, secure environment. But the busses haven’t been running since [two weeks ago] Thursday and I really need to get downtown to take care of some business, so I hope they are running again soon. All the businesses that burned down on Lake St and Hiawatha and Minnehaha and Cedar, all those businesses are gone and I use that neighborhood a lot for the things I need. Two places where I do business at are going to be down permanently. All those restaurants down there, they’re gone. The pawn shop, I normally stop in down there. There was a computer there that I was going to get. I had discussed purchasing it with the manager and he said for me to wait because he was going to mark it down. And now the whole thing is gone.
Plus now all those jobs at all those businesses are gone. And many of the people that work in that area are Negro, at least 40% of the people working around there. And if the small businesses aren’t hiring people, there’s no jobs. It’s those small businesses that produce the economic opportunities.
I notice you don’t refer to yourself as “Black” or “African-American” which I typically hear.
I use the word Negro, I don’t want to use the word Black. There are so many types of people who are classified as Black, but we are not all the same. Black people were the first to enslave other Blacks, technically, but while we are cousins, we were not the same people. I am a descendant of slaves, and I want to use a term that reflects that community. Jesse Jackson came up with the term African-American in 1988, and I don’t like that either. Of all the terms we have been called through my lifetime, Negro is more true to what we are - it comes from a Spanish word for Black but meaning “people of God” in the scripture. And if you talk to people and they tell you “people don’t use that term anymore,” you can give them my name and my phone number, I’ll be happy to set them straight!
Got it! So back to the businesses that have been affected, what else has changed?
A problem is that the people who patronize those businesses, they normally walk or ride the bus to get there. Now they have to go further away from home to do their shopping and business. The Target there is where a lot of people in the neighborhood get their fresh produce. They have those fruit cups and salad bowls, you could go in and get healthy food to eat. At the Target or at that Cub Foods. Now you gotta go some good distance to get fresh produce. As for me, I could go by that Target during the day and get some fresh fruit or a small salad.
And the post office is gone. I never imagined seeing something like this.
Me either. I was a child under ten during the 60’s, and I did see a lot of burned-out stuff then. But I never thought I would see it here in Minneapolis or in the state of Minnesota, or as an adult.
I have degrees in German and Accounting. To my largest benefit has been studying German philosophy and history. That was my favorite, I studied all that and I learned a lot by doing that. It helped me a lot in the workplace, both philosophy and accounting. Understanding the history of the people that you’re dealing with is essential. A lot of times when I talk with people, I know more about their history than they do. And if you don’t know your history, you’re going to do what you’ve always done. Most people have the same moral and spiritual beliefs of their people had 4000 years ago. So you have to know your history in order to communicate intelligently with your fellow man. The main issue with we Negros in America is, we don’t know our history. We don’t know our history because we can study about every group on earth - their philosophers, heroes, poets, musicians - but we aren’t taught anything about our history. Our history lessons don’t start in 1492 BCE when they should, but they start on the shores of America in 1685.
When you see the same kind of violence happening now as you remember from your childhood, what kind of memories does it bring back to you?
Back then it was really more racism and discrimination based against us having any kind of success. It really set us back so we wouldn’t be able to vote, and they destroyed the Negro businesses so we wouldn’t have an economic base. Sort of Wall Street in reverse. Here in Minnesota, as always when you have this, this time the enemies of this country are the same people who were enemies during that time. They want to destroy our Negro middle class and also make sure they destroy our neighborhoods. That group does not want us to prevail at anything. The whole thing is done to destroy the middle class in America. That is the only stumbling block to slavery of the world, period. The middle class stands between the outright enslavement of the planet, right here in America. If they can do that they can simultaneously break the Negro communities too.
We never have been compensated for slavery. That’s something that’s never been done. That’s been a real problem. Officially, slavery started April 1, 1555 when Captain Sir John Hawkins sailed a ship named Jesus around the continent of Africa looking for Africans who would be sold into slavery. Initially from the 1500’s when they started trading slaves in the Caribbean, they would just bring over the men. They would work the men to death so most of us died before we were 35 years old. Then they started also bringing over women, and boys and girls. That turned into centuries of physical, psychological, mental, and spiritual trauma. That went until 1865 when the Civil War ended.
We should have had counseling starting then, to deal with and heal the trauma. Remember, we did not have any literacy. If anyone was found teaching you to read, both of you would be lynched – both the person teaching you, and the person wanting to learn to read. We didn’t know nothing about voting. We were supposed to have all the rights under the Constitution but our divine rights were not upheld. And, we were not given any tools, or any money. We couldn’t do anything further but continue to be slaves, which continued basically up until 1965. We had no spiritual training, and no training of our own history. When something happens, the way we voice our thoughts is through aggression, because we haven’t been given any other way. And that’s not productive.
Here is an example of why you have to know your history, to understand what is going on now. Back in the 1930’s [during the Great Depression], they passed benefits to help people who were unemployed. But those benefits were not available to us, and we had the highest rate of unemployment in the country. We were unemployed at three times the numbers of whites but we were not allowed to even apply for those benefits. The assistance passed during the Depression, those benefits were not available to us. If you had inquired about it, you would have been lynched for your efforts. They were giving out farm loans and home loans in the 1930’s. One Negro asked for the money for his farm and the amount that he should have got was $200, they put him in jail for applying for the money.
When we started participating in the Welfare benefits in 1965, in the truce between Dr King and President Johnson, we got all the food stamps and all the welfare that was passed back in the 1930’s, they allowed us to access to that. But they also put some restrictions on it. For a person to get the aid, there could not be an able-bodied male in the house over the age of 17. If there was any man in the house, whether it was a son, a grandson, or whoever, then that house would not qualify for aid. That was the beginning of the destruction of Negro families.
Remember, technically we got the right to vote shortly after June 1, 1865 but we couldn’t vote because of poll taxes or they wouldn’t let you get to the polls, and they would lynch you for trying to vote. There was no protection. We had rights, theoretically, but they were never enforced. And it is still going on. That’s the reason for all this with George Floyd. What’s happening is the anger, the frustration, the oppression, the racism, of the last 150 years. This is coming to a head. In the instant that happens you have 150 years of history coming to a head at once.
Where do you see the way forward?
That’s a good question. There’s not going to be a shortcut. There’s not going to be a shortcut. There’s not going to be a shortcut. The problem really has to be solved by the white folks because they are the ones that started this problem by bringing us forcefully to this country and then denying us our rights. This problem does have to be addressed and one day will be addressed, or this country will fall flat.
Number one, we have to be taught our history. We need to be reintroduced to our original language. We need to be given an associate degree-level education, or at least a high school level education. We need to be taught our culture, we need to be taught our religion. And in this process we need housing and health insurance.
Let’s talk about Mile in My Shoes. How did you first get involved?
A friend of mine named Jesse was after me to go running for about two months. So one day I went and signed up. After that it was about two weeks before I made it to a run. I started running because I wanted to improve my health. That’s why I went into the shelter, I wanted to improve my health – my diabetes, my blood pressure. The diabetic medicine is between $600 and $800 a month. The blood pressure medicine is $200 a month. And who can afford that? When I run, I am able to control my blood pressure along with an herbal supplement well enough so I could stop taking the medicine! The running and my diet helps that. With MiMS, my numbers got consistently better. My blood sugar is under control now too. I feel better now than I have in ten years.
Are you doing one of the virtual MiMS teams this summer?
Oh yes! I’m with Matt and Amakoe and Ashley.
What are you looking forward to for this summer?
I’m going to do the 5K race in August. I’ll be training all this month and July.
You’re training for the Downtown Run Around? What is going to be a challenge for your training this summer?
I’m going to train for the 10K but I’m going to run the 5K. [laughs] I told [another Run Mentor] Ben, he does those 100-mile races and all that crap, and I told him “Ben, you can have that crap.”
Have you set a special goal for the race?
I’m going to try and beat my last time. It was 58 or 59 minutes. I’m going to try and do at least 45 minutes for the 5K. One good thing about running is when you drink a lot of water like I do you get all the toxins out and you can think better.
I think running kind of oxygenates your brain so you can think more clearly.
Yes, it does. You have to be able to think and when you get your body in physical shape, you expand all your options. That’s what MiMS does. MiMS can put a person on the path to recovery, if they stick to it. Also, the running also really diminished my depression by at least 50 to 60 percent.
Sounds like you’re a lifelong runner now.
Oh, yes.
You’ve been with MiMS for awhile, and have had the chance to run quite a lot. What’s one of your moments that stands out or a favorite memory?
Number one, I ran my first official race, which is the Drumstick Dash. That was the first regulation race I ever ran. That was last year on Thanksgiving Day.
That was a cold morning. What kept you going through that cold race?
Jenny! Jenny was my mentor.
She wasn’t going to let you quit.
No [laughs]. Quite frankly, she was not.
Sounds like Jenny was a good run mentor for you. What makes a good run mentor?
They realize, I am 66 years old. They are sensitive to the needs that I can’t run like a young person. They are cognizant of the fact that I need to take baby steps first and not overexert myself.
They tune into what you need?
Absolutely, yes.
What is your other favorite memory?
The other one is the banquet. It was good getting to see all the people that were there. One of the guests, Will [Leer"], he and his wife [Aisha Praught Leer] are elite runners from Colorado and they’re supporters of MiMS. I think that’s very noble. These are people that improve our lives every day, and we don’t even know they exist.
Frizell, I wish you best of luck with your 45 minute 5K this summer. And thank you for your insights about history - it spotlights how I need to learn more about the historical context we live in and how it has shaped and defined this past few weeks’ events. I’ll be checking out some of the reading lists that have been circulating and, of course, having more conversations like these with my Mile in My Shoes teammates. “See” you in August!
In Their Own Words: Life in the Time of Corona
Mile in My Shoes Team VOA Southside Alumni Members share how COVID-19 has affected their work and personal lives, and discuss what life must be like for people still in prison.
Join a typical Mile in My Shoes circle-up, and you’ll find yourself arm-linked with people who do all types of work - graphic designer, baker, financial consultant, engineer, teacher, physical therapist, barber, stay-at-home parent, hospital manager, warehouse laborer, truck driver. And while the heart of MiMS is focusing on what makes us all similar, this global pandemic highlights how different our ability to “shelter in place” and “social distance” - in short, keep ourselves and our families’ safe - can be. In order to help the greater MiMS community gain a better understanding of some of the unique challenges Covid-19 has brought to men & women in reentry, MiMS’ Run Mentor Laura B spoke with five Alumni of Team Southside about how this pandemic and stay-at-home order has affected their employment, working conditions and their personal lives, as well as their thoughts on the challenges facing people currently in prison.
Laura: Between the five of you, you represent manufacturing work (a foundry, a recycling plant, and food production) and the service industry (a restaurant chef and a barber). For those of you who are still working, have you been able to telecommute, or do you have to go into work?
Hardy: In a job like I have with physical actions, not just moving electrons, we can’t telecommute. I’m glad to be working though.
Jesse: It’s not like you can telecommute in to make [the food]. You’ve got to go into work. We’re doing everything we can to stay open because we don’t get paid if we shut down. And we have been slammed with orders.
Laura: How has the way you work been affected?
Jesse: I am tired. Tired, tired, tired. My hands are extremely sore, they’re starting to crack open because it’s constant, constant hand washing and sanitizing. Any free time we have where we’re not busting our ass keeping the machines running, we’re cleaning stuff. The last couple weeks it’s been pretty harsh.
Also, even though our orders have increased, we are working with a third fewer people, so we are busy as hell. We usually have temps who help package stuff so we can keep the machines running, but we don’t have the temp service coming anymore. They were an uncontrolled variable. It’s safer not to have them there. There’s times when I’m doing five or six different jobs. It’s rough because we’ve had so much more to do because of the Corona virus, but it’s better than not working.
Hardy : My facility has also laid a lot of people off. They use a lot of contract temporary employees, and most of them were laid off. I’m fortunate that I’m expecting to be able to keep working, but even so my hours were cut back.
Laura: Are you able to social distance where you work? Do you feel safe?
Jason: I work in a foundry, so due to OSHA regulations, everybody already had to wear a N95 mask regardless of Covid-19. When we’re working we pretty much stand side-by-side, but everybody is wearing earplugs, mask, safety glasses, a hat, and is fully dressed in fire-retardant clothing. For a person to pass it to someone in the foundry would be pretty tough. I don’t know what we’ll do if the foundry can’t keep getting the N95 masks though. We can not reuse the masks. I know we are struggling to get them, and if we run out I think a lot of the guys won’t be able to work.
Jesse: Where I work there’s a lot of tasks where we just can’t be six feet apart. When you’re in a situation like how the line is set up, there’s only so much you can do because sometimes you have to be in close quarters to get stuff to work. We try to stay as far as we can out of people’s way but there’s some spots where you just have to be a little bit closer.
Laura: What about other time spent at work, are there accommodations made there?
Jason: In the locker room and break room, guys are sitting far apart enough to maintain distance. It’s good to see, because you get around a group of guys who are true blue collar workers and you might not think they’re paying attention [to Covid-19 safety warnings], but they are. Some people think blue collar workers in this industry either have that “we’re invincible” or “that’s never going to affect me” kind of thing, but they are conscious of it.
Laura: What about the two of you who aren’t working? How are you doing?
Mark: I got laid off right away, on March 17. I was working as a banquet chef at a nice white tablecloth restaurant and they had to shut the doors. My wife and I have enough to live on in our savings and my wife is still employed, so we are doing ok. We have everything we need and we don’t need to buy anything new. Also I have health insurance through my wife’s job, so that’s another way I’m in a very fortunate place compared to so many people. I qualify for $150 a week for unemployment. You can’t live on that! That’s not enough to even pay rent. If I didn’t have my wife’s income then I wouldn’t be able to make it.
Shane: I also got laid off right away. I’m a barber and my income is now zero dollars. There is no help for me as a person with a state license to cut hair in a barber shop. I’m still paying for my license, fees, rent, taxes, but there is no unemployment available for me since I am self-employed. How can you just shut me down for no one knows how many weeks? I look at the stimulus package, but I make $1000 a week, what the hell is a $1200 check going to do for me? My mind is one-track right now, just wanting to get back to work and make money.
Laura: Do you have any other income streams?
Shane: I’ve been doing rounds once a week to customers who I’ve been serving for years. I wear gloves and a mask, and I make a couple hundred dollars, but I put myself at risk. I’ve taken a lot of precautions [not to catch Covid-19] but I figure at 44 [years old], I’m ok.
I also teach at a barber school in St Cloud, but we had to close the school for now. That means I don’t get paid, the students can’t take their tests to get their barber license, and we can’t pay our rent so it looks like we are going to lose our lease because the landlord is not going to give us any break. We just don’t have any income coming in because half the income would be tuition from the students and the other half comes from the public who come in for haircuts from the students.
Laura: How else has social distancing and the shutdowns affected all of you?
Hardy: I use public transit [bus] getting to and from work. That has been more restricted lately – they just passed a measure limiting the bus to 10 riders at a time. On top of that the timing has switched to Saturday schedules all the time. So there are fewer buses, and fewer people allowed on the buses that do come. Depending on the route, if you can’t get on the bus the next one could be an hour later, which would seriously hinder someone trying to get to work. You can’t call your boss and say “I’m going to be late because I couldn’t get on the bus.” Now that the weather is getting a little better, I can use my bike to get to work and back but it’s about 15 miles each way. I’m glad to be off the bus even though it seems a little far on the bike.
Jason: With the library being closed, there goes my Internet access. I don’t have Internet at home so I have a hard time staying informed on news. I have the basic TV channels, so I try to catch news reports on TV. That’s the only thing I can do.
Hardy: I don’t have the Internet at home either. I have a small portable radio, so in the morning I listen to NPR to stay informed.
Jesse: With the library closed, I don’t have Internet either.
Laura: So most of you don’t have Internet access. Without the Internet and your usual activities on pause, it must be hard to stay informed about what’s going on and to feel connected.
Hardy: I am just getting snippets of information from my sister. I’ve been trying to figure out the graphs and where we are in the rise of infections. I realize it’s going to get worse before we’re over the bad part.
Jason: The big problem with this is that I feel really isolated. I can’t do anything that I would normally be doing. I miss MiMS for that reason too, it’s my social thing that I do.
Shane: I feel very worked up and isolated. I’m very outgoing, and I have a job where you see a lot of people in a day. I miss the connection with MiMS while we can’t run. When I’m around MiMS my compassionate side comes out, and I’m a little bankrupt on compassion right now. It’s a really scary time. It is very emotionally exhausting, to be doing nothing.
Mark: Yeah, sheltering in place for me is otherwise known as hanging out at home and doing nothing. The sad reality of my life, having been incarcerated so recently for five years, is that this is very normal to me. I had a great job when I was incarcerated. I was the clerk for the laundry, doing all the paperwork. But otherwise I had nothing to do all day. The job gave me a routine to follow in the morning. I’d go to work, then I’d come back and go for a walk in the afternoon. I’ve been walking and running a lot in my neighborhood now too, but besides that I am sitting around all day doing nothing.
Laura: So for people who are in prison now, what do you think it is like?
Mark: Right now, being incarcerated would be so scary. They’ve already had three deaths from Corona in the facility that I was at in Ohio. You have to understand the living conditions there. It’s like a big gymnasium with 20’ ceilings, and everything is concrete. Imagine an office where everyone sits in a cubicle. Except at the facility, the walls are concrete and do not go all the way to the ceiling – they are only 5’ high. So if you are sleeping on the top bunk you are at the same height as the wall, with another bunk in the other cube but right next to you. If you roll off the bunk you are going to roll right into the cube next to you. When you think about that and the conditions of how this virus is spreading, there is absolutely no way that the virus could be contained in that environment. Especially now that we know that asymptomatic carriers are out there and can spread it just as easily as someone who is exhibiting symptoms. There’s absolutely no way that the Bureau of Prisons is going to be able to prevent the spread of this. In one housing unit there could be 120 guys, and if your neighbor coughs, it’s going right into your cube. Each cube is about 8x10 and has two and sometimes three men.
Laura: What do you think about the discussions to release some people early, as a way to control the spread of the virus in the prisons?
Shane: I’ve seen those articles. It sounds good but we’re talking about people who have no resources, no money, no jobs, no treatment, no health care. Unless they have a family or money there isn’t shit for them to come home to. That’s why I like MiMS so much, it brings people into a fold who have burnt their bridges with their family, and helps them start to rebuild. But for most of these people there’s no safety net or support to catch them or for most of them, anywhere to go.
Mark: I 100% agree. For people like me – who have a stable home and a support network to return to, a place to go, food in the refrigerator, a place where they can pick up where they left off – I think that’s great. The thing that concerns me is that I met a number of men who had a better life when they were inside the prison than they had outside. They were homeless, unemployed, illiterate, and worse. There were so many men that I met, that if the BOP called them into the office and said “OK, pack up your stuff, you’re leaving next week,” that would be a huge burden on these men because they have no place to go. Some of these men who are getting early released will be kicked out on the street, and I’m worried about their safety and well-being. I haven’t heard anything ensuring that once these men leave the facility, they will be taken care of in the sense of a stable place to live. I met enough men like that [when I was in prison] that the first thing I thought of when I started seeing news that people were going to be released, was that those men will be in a total panic at the thought of being released. Getting out of prison is a good thing but there’s other facets to think about.
Laura: For everyone, no matter what your situation, there is so much anxiety and uncertainty right now. How do you feel about where you are now and for the future?
Jason: When we got notice that the foundry is an essential employer, it was a quite a weight lifted off my shoulders. I was worried that we might have to shut down, and I was concerned about missing a paycheck, and maybe even more than one, while we were closed. My thoughts go out to the people in the community who aren’t working. I worry about whether the economy will rebound, whether the local businesses will come back. It’s such a mess that I’ve never heard of. We tend to think we’re on the top of the food chain, and then something we can’t even see can actually kill us.
Shane: My girlfriend is an optometrist and she just got furloughed after having that job for 20 years, because she is “not essential.” How can eyeglasses not be “essential”? And who knows if their shop is even going to be a thing [after this]? The shop sells high-end eyeglass frames. Will there still be a market for them when all this dust settles? What luxury items will people still be able to afford? I put myself in a good position as a barber. A haircut is the essential luxury item, because people will figure out how to pay for a good haircut. I’m in a recession-proof industry.
I have a cushion of money saved but lots of people don’t have that. It’s sink or swim for everyone. Do you sink or can you swim? What can I go without? What are my needs and wants? This is going to hugely fracture society. You thought there was a separation of “haves” and “have nots” before – it’s going to be terrible now. I don’t know what will happen if things don’t go back [to normal] soon. I’m worried anxiety among people is going to get to a blowing point. This has opened my eyes to a lot of abuses and neglect in the system. I’m also worried about how are we going to pay for all this?
Hardy: I get worried too, but I’m blessed and very fortunate to be in the situation I’m in. I have a full pantry, a bank account, I have work to go to, and I have friends I can contact over the phone and by text. The weather is getting better so I can get outside a little more and get exercise. I think it’s going to get worse before it gets better. I’d rather they shut things down now for a shorter time, than it be worse later and have to shut down longer to get things under control.
Laura: Before we go, can you tell me anything that has uplifted you lately?
Hardy: I was cheered when I saw a photo Ben [MiMS Southside Core Team Mentor] posted of himself post-run in the VOA parking lot. I miss MiMS and I miss running. My pants are getting tighter so I need to get back out there. I hope to see everyone again soon and well.
Jason: I hope that events like this can help bring people closer together and see the good that people are doing. The way these guys are sewing masks at home to give to nurses. There’s a restaurant that is making meals for the doctors and nurses at the hospital. It’s stories like that, that give you hope for humanity. It takes a crisis to bring it out, and it’s too bad it takes a crisis. That’s one thing I like about MiMS: I’ve found a community that actually cares about me and I miss it. We go out and run and laugh and tell stories. We share food and get together. It leaves an emptiness to not have it. It’s one of those organizations that a lot of mainstream people wouldn’t know of, since MiMS is reaching out to people in my situation. MiMS comes to places like halfway houses and searches for those people who are lost inside and who don’t feel like they belong anywhere. People who are confused about what the next step is, and MiMS is there with the next step. When I got out [of prison] I wanted to try and become a part of something. At first MiMS sounded scary because it was unknown – what do they want, what do I have to do? That’s why I hate this virus coming on, because I wanted to make a really good stand this year for the half marathon. So I’m still running on my own even though the team can’t meet right now.
Mark: Right. Get outside, enjoy the sunshine, and move your body. And stay away from people. And stay home.
Meet Jesse, Alumni Member, Team Southside
For this piece, Alumni Mentor Jesse sat down with Team Southside Run Mentor and Race Coordinator Laura B. to have a conversation about MiMS, Covid-19, and all things running.
Jesse joined Team Southside in June of 2018 after almost six years in prison. After being released from the VOA reentry center in April of 2019, Jesse continued to return each week to run with his team. He’s run nearly a dozen races with MiMS, from 5Ks to several half-marathons (City of Lakes and the Torchlight 5k are his favorites) and is looking forward to returning as soon as he can to his role of Alumni Mentor.
Laura B first joined Mile in My Shoes in the summer of 2018, answering a call for mentors to help with Twin Cities Marathon distance training. Since then, Laura has become an integral part of the MiMS family, serving as the Team Southside Race Coordinator, on the MiMSies committee, and most recently as the chair of the 2020 Downtown Run Around planning committee.
Laura: How long have you been with MiMS?
Jesse: I came in in April or May of 2018. And we are on the best MiMS team ever. Southside!
Laura: Why is Southside the best team?
Jesse: The energy of the people. I’m an introvert and I’m not a huge people-person, but I’ve met some people that I’ll remember a long time. You meet a lot of great people there. We have a special energy and buzz going on. And we even have a lot of alumni mentors who come back to keep running.
Laura: Yeah, that is one thing I like about Southside and that I’ve learned from running with the group: Sometimes I don’t even know who’s an alum and who’s a mentor. One guy showed up one time and was running with us, and I didn’t even know that he had been a Resident, I just thought he was running with us. That question didn’t even occur to me, I didn’t even think about it. We just run.
Jesse: When I was at the VOA, it wasn’t the hardest time of my life but it was an extremely stressful and difficult time coming out of prison and trying to adapt. Just the energy and the willingness to get out and do something that the [MiMS] group brought was great. That’s why I’m an Alumni Mentor and why I keep trying to come back. I know how bad it can be and I want to give back to these people and help them out too, the way the group helped me.
Laura: What were some of the ways that MiMS helped you?
Jesse: It got me out and socially interactive with more people and experiencing more of the Twin Cities area. Getting to talk with actual people, not other prisoners, people with completely different backgrounds, coming from different areas of business or religion or beliefs. The fact that they all had the same high energy level.
Laura: How did you decide to join the team?
Jesse: A few years before when I was in prison, I was already trying to lose weight and get healthy, and I started running a little bit. I got out and was in there the first week and Ben [longtime Team Southside Run Mentor] came down during my orientation. He was like, “Hey we’ve got this amazing group. We go do this run stuff.” And I thought, “You know what? That sounds like a lot of shit.” Then Ben started talking it up but the first thought I had was “That is way too much work, even though I want to get out and do stuff.” Then I thought “Screw it, I’m going to do it. This guy’s got a lot of energy, he’s so positive, I’m going to sign up.”
I did and I haven’t looked back. He got me, he hooked me. I don’t always necessarily see eye to eye with him, the way he sees a lot of things, but I really respect him and enjoy talking with him and being around him. He’s a great guy. I’m glad he’s the one that came to invite me.
Laura: One thing I like about the runs is getting the chance to talk to people about all different kinds of topics and I don’t always see eye to eye with them, but I’ve always learned something new about them or the world or it’s revealed to me something that I should be questioning about what I thought.
Jesse: There’s so many people that seem to think that “this person and you have had basically the same experiences, so you guys should understand each other.” But even if you’ve been in that person’s shoes, you still don’t. You can get a good idea but you don’t totally understand. A lot of people in MiMS can see the broader picture, or try their best to. They try not to be putting people in groups, like “these people all were in prison so they all think this way or behave this way,” they see more of the person. They see the commonalities between everyone but see us as a person.
I recall things more through feelings than actual memories. I feel happiness that someone is willing to see or listen to my point of view as separate from everybody else’s. Like when you and I were at the dome in Eden Prairie with the team this winter, and we just walked and talked for awhile. You’re willing to listen and talk through things with me. Days like that make things so much better.
Laura: I was wondering if you could comment, from your experience with the VOA and the prison system, what are some of the ways COVID-19 might be affecting the guys that people might not understand or realize? What are some of the concerns that they might be facing personally?
Jesse: It would be a lot of family things, when complete cities are shut down and you’ve only got so much contact with the outside because you can only have so many minutes a month phone-wise, that can make it incredibly hard. [While in prison] I was in more of a medical center, so we had a lot more of the people who are disabled or elderly. To me that would be extremely scary considering how quickly this stuff spreads and how negatively it affects the elderly. If you’re sitting there in prison and you’re not doing good health-wise the way it is, and the next thing you’ve got this thing blowing through. I’m sure there’s a lot of people that are expecting to die in prison because of this. That’s got to be a huge stressor.
Even if you’re healthy, it can still affect you. When you’re living in a place packed with three to four people in a 10x12 room, you’re expecting to get sick. It’s WHEN, not IF. That’s got to be a shitty feeling. At least here on the outside I might be able to do something to not get sick or at least not get it for a long time. There, you know it’s coming. It’s like looking at a semi coming at you. And you can’t do anything about it. It’s a small space, you can’t separate six feet, there’s no room for it. It’s like telling sardines to move an inch apart.
Laura: At the VOA, they’re not allowed to go out or have visitors, they can only go to work.
If they can’t get out to get their personal items, even something like a Q-tip is amazing. Those creature comforts like that are crazy.
Laura: Those things that you need to have to take care of yourself, that we might take for granted?
Jesse: Nobody thinks much about a Q-tip until you don’t have one and can’t get one.
I think that the VOA might be even harder because you’ve got a little bit more freedom but you’re still stuck there, you’re still looking up at that semi truck of coronavirus coming in. A lot of the times it felt worse being in the VOA than it did being in prison. I really feel bad for them [people currently in reentry] because you get resigned in prison because there’s not a lot of choices. Then you feel like being in the halfway house you would have more options. And then not having them would be hard. And even in prison on the worst days you can still go outside and do something.
Laura: You’ve been facing an injury, you would much rather be running but you keep coming to MiMS even though you’re walking right now. How did you get up and come out at 7 am on that cold morning?
Jesse: There’s a handful of things. The motivation behind the fact that even on the worst days when I’ve felt my absolute shittiest, and I don’t want to do a damn thing, I’ve never gone out for a run and said “I wish I hadn’t done that.” I’ve always felt better after a run no matter what the weather conditions are or anything. Even those days where it’s a blizzard snowing and we went out and ran anyways – it’s great. The fact that I appreciate so much what MiMS has done for me, that there’s still people going out to run and the least I feel like I can do is go out and help and support the other people going through what I did at the halfway house. I know how much it helps. I used to run with headphones all the time and I can’t run with music anymore. Even if I’m running by myself, I have to have my headphones out and I’m listening and enjoying my situation where I’m at in life.
Laura: Touching on your injury, you’ve been facing that since around August last year. You were training for the marathon and then you got plantar fasciitis. That’s an injury so many runners have faced and is so frustrating. What have you found challenging about it and what has been successful for you in dealing with it?
Jesse: Challenging, I’m obviously a person who sets a goal, even a small goal, and I hate not being able to complete it when I know I can. Being so close to running the marathon and not doing it was very devastating. I actually think I was so focused on the goal that I ignored the signs from my body and I hurt my foot more than plantar fasciitis.
Laura: The emotional part when you’re injured is almost harder than the physical part. You’re used to keeping yourself fit and you get that satisfaction from meeting your goals, and it helps relieve stress. Have you found other ways to meet those emotional needs?
Jesse: It is hard. I’ve been trying to walk on Sundays. I redoubled my efforts at work. That’s about the only outlet I have right now without damaging myself more. That’s about it. I don’t have a lot of other physical outlets right now. I do have a jigsaw puzzle sitting on the table and I’ve been trying to read more.
Laura: We’ve talked before about your journey, of a person who was not at the weight you wanted to be at and the challenges you faced making some changes. Would you like to talk about that?
Jesse: Sure, I’m proud of what I did. I had a lot of bored eating and stress eating and a sedentary lifestyle, just getting too complacent. I drank way too much, I was a pretty heavy alcoholic. And all that added up. I still worked every day, made my money, and didn’t do much else. I kept getting fatter and fatter. Surprisingly I didn’t get diabetes, but I almost wrecked my liver. All this happened and my dad died while I was waiting to get sentenced and go to prison, that was a huge stressor. Getting as heavy as I did, I started to have a lot of health problems. My feet and legs would start swelling and I was in constant pain. My joints were going to hell. I was up to 320 pounds. When I got locked up I was like, “I can’t do it anymore.” The first day where I walked one lap around the track I was so impressed with myself. It wasn’t even a third of a mile, but I was so happy that I made that one lap. I thought, “I can do this.” I always set really small goals, really realistic goals. I wasn’t like planning to drop 120 pounds and being ripped or anything like that. I was trying to take everything as realistic as I could. I thought, “I’m here for six years and I’m going to make myself better.” I followed that and slowly but surely lost a whole bunch of weight. Every pound I lost I felt a whole lot better.
Laura: You said there were times you hit plateaus. How did you motivate yourself through the plateaus?
Jesse: I set really small goals so plateaus were never that long. There were so many people throughout my life before prison that would want something super amazingly far away and then they try to go for it and then get mad when it didn’t happen and quit. That’s the kind of person I am too, I realized that if I set a goal and didn’t reach it, that I’d be depressed and quit. So I always set super small goals so I’d keep on trying. If I was stuck at three laps around the track, my next goal would be four laps around the track. Not six because I know I can do four, I just have to push myself a little harder. I kept on going like that. I never did anything ridiculously huge. Everything was manageable, everything was reasonable. I never went on a straight diet where I said “I’m going to eat super healthy, I’m going to cut out everything.” From day one of doing all that I said, “I’m going to eat my cookies, I’m going to drink my pop. I’m going to enjoy that and I’m not going to be miserable. ” I think that’s one thing that stops a lot of people because they get miserable because they can’t have stuff they enjoy, instead of doing it in moderation.
Laura: You could use that strategy for pretty much any goal.
Jesse: Oh, yeah. Definitely. I’ve tried to use that for everything. Right now I’m trying to use that for work. I’m trying to find little stuff that I can learn how to do to make myself more indispensable. Not necessarily so they can’t ever get rid of me, but more valuable as an employee. I’m at the point now where they gave me a test I can do to test up to another pay grade. So I’m slowly but surely trying to do that.
Laura: It sounds like you might not have thought of working there as being your “dream job,” but that you are really making it into something that is satisfying for you.
Jesse: It’s about as close to my dream job as I could in this profession. I make a ridiculous amount of money for the work I do. That’s why I want to learn to do more, there’s a lot of days where I don’t feel like I’m earning my $22 an hour. I basically stand there and babysit a machine, so I’m trying to learn more so I’m really earning that money.
Laura: I’m not sure there’s a lot of people who would see it that way.
Jesse: Well I look at it as, they didn’t have to hire me. They could have made an excuse because I’m a felon. I’m a federal felon. They could have just claimed policy and said “No, we’re not going to hire you.” Other places have. I got fired from a place because they found out I was a felon and they had an issue with it. That was horrible. They gave me a chance, I’m trying to show them that their chance wasn’t a bad one. Maybe at some point they’ll be like “Well, we could probably take another chance on another inmate or another felon.”
Laura: You never know what ripple effect one action can have.
Jesse: Definitely, the whole butterfly effect.
Laura: What does that mean to you?
Jesse: It’s like, I always hear people at work talking about “this place wouldn’t hire felons” and stuff like that. And I’m not saying anything because I don’t want to cause an issue, but they took a chance. And I figure if they take a chance with me maybe they can take a chance with somebody else. Maybe one of them says, “Hey, we have this person here and they were a felon and they worked out amazingly,” and maybe they are talking to a different company and so on down the line and it spreads. Maybe I can show them that not everyone who goes through that situation is a bad person. People just want to get back on their feet.
Laura: You are so goal-oriented. What are your goals for the year ahead?
Jesse: I'd like to do two to three things I've never done before. Being interviewed would be one. Surviving a world wide pandemic would be another. I also always wanted to try sky diving. Maybe this is the year for me!
Meet Meghan, Alumni Member
Team Higher Ground St. Paul
Meghan joined Team Higher Ground St. Paul in 2018. While she was an energetic presence, she struggled to come consistently and completed the season just one run short of earning her 10-run MiMS shirt. But she rejoined in 2019 at the urging of fellow team members, and has been one of the most consistent members this season. She became an Alumni Member over the summer and has completed over 30 runs as of Sep 2019.
Meghan, how did you end up at Higher Ground St. Paul?
During the four years prior to getting to HG I moved a total of 28 times. I lived all over, trying out different ways to make things work. About a year and a half ago I heard about Dorothy Day Center (now Higher Ground) but I didn’t want to accept that I was running out of options. Also I had two cats and I really didn’t want to give them up - I had one for 12 years. I moved in with my sister for awhile, but eventually I knew I had to get it together on my own - I said to myself “Meghan you’re almost 38 years old, you need to get yourself together.” So I surrendered my cats and I showed up at Higher Ground St. Paul. I had no idea how much help I would be able to get here. I really needed a foundation, a place to be grounded, and I found that here. .
Why did you decide to join Mile in My Shoes?
When I first got to Higher Ground I was in the first floor shelter, on a mat on the floor. Then I got a bunk and a locker which made a huge difference, but I still had to be out every day at 8am and carry a lot of my stuff with me. Rachel (Alumni Member) tried to convince me to join the team at that time, but I just wasn’t ready for it. After a few months, thanks to the help of staff and my willingness to put myself out there and admit that I needed help, I got my own place up on the fourth floor. That was so exciting, I just couldn’t stop smiling. Having my own place was huge for my mental health - privacy, no cameras, space to have art supplies and express myself that way.
Around that time, I started seeing two MiMS members, Terry and Steph, coming back from MiMS runs and the way they acted and talked about it really motivated me to join the team. I’ve never been a runner but I thought if they are capable of this, maybe so am I. I saw them getting so much out of it, they were always running around and so happy and moving forward. I thought “I want that. I want to be able to run - not from my problems, not from my past, but to help me deal with things and move forward.” I never saw myself as a runner but it feels so good to know that I am capable of this. It makes me realize I am capable of a lot of things.
Last year, when I joined, I was struggling to come consistently - and I’m not afraid to say it was somewhat due to struggles with mental health. Terry would come to get me up and I’d say “not today.” But things have gotten better this year and I’ve been able to come almost every run! My goal was not to force myself to make it EVERY morning, but to take every morning as a new chance - I told myself “tomorrow morning I will try.” I had to keep telling myself “Dude GET UP you want to do this!” Now my ass is up at 4:30am every MiMS run morning and it’s so easy now! The team really motivates me and being capable to wake up on my own is really awesome.
The camaraderie and energy is amazing. It’s like nothing else - the best way to start your day! Running and art are my life now. And meds help, too! That has helped me able to get back consistently. I really don’t know where I would be without Terry & the rest of the MiMS team.
What has been the best part about being part of the team?
Oh man - that’s a lot of things! Seeing everyone when I turn the corner onto the square in the morning. Having something to look forward to. The mentors are always asking how I am doing - you guys REALLY care and I’ve never really had that before. And I am getting in great shape! I can balance now doing quad stretches. I’m like “HEY look at me!”
I’m also really close with my parents now - because I have been able to make these strides. They can’t stop telling me how proud of me they are. And I am proud of myself I can actually say that now. I love the life I have now!
What has been the most challenging part?
Sometimes I struggle with comparing myself to others on the team - that was challenging. The mentors have really helped me get over that - being really positive and making a big deal out of my accomplishments. I really love the mentors.
What is one goal you have set for yourself?
The Drumstick Dash 10K! That will be my longest race. My first 5K was Torchlight. I was super sick that day, had a bad head cold but I was like “I am going to do this.” It was a LOT of people so that was unexpected and it was a lot of process. But when the gun went off, I looked at my mentors and was like “Shit let’s do this!” My mentors Meg & Heidi supported me to much that day. It was huge to cross the finish line. I don’t even know how to describe how that felt - it was such an “OH MY GOD” moment to cross! And then I collapsed. ;-)
Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
I see a lot for myself in the next five years. I’ll definitely keep this running thing up - I will always come back and run with MiMS. I’d love to do art and have my own studio, and to go back to school for graphic design. I also want to DJ. I have big goals for myself, this is just the beginning.
What has been your favorite moment with Mile in My Shoes thus far?
I really loved the first social event with my team, a BBQ in the park. Baby Jenga! It was so fun to hang out with all these happy people - I thought, hey I am a part of something greater than myself. This year was Torchlight, when I heard the announcer say my name as I rounded the corner to the finish line! Well, until you asked me to do this interview. This is now the best moment of my life so far. I’m so glad I answered the phone!
What is your favorite thing about yourself?
My smile
If you were a cartoon character, who would you be & why?
Tigger - I’m bouncy and I make up my own words, that’s why!
Any last thing you want to say, Meghan?
YES! 3-2-1 MILE IN MY SHOES WOO!
Meet Craig, Resident Member
Team Higher Ground Minneapolis
Craig is one of the first members to join Team Higher Ground Minneapolis thanks to our partnership with Exodus House, a transitional & supportive housing development run by Catholic Charities. Craig, who gets a ride to Higher Ground from Exodus staff at 5:45am each Tue/Thur/Sat, was recruited by Alumni Mentor and fellow Exodus resident Earl, who helped form the new Exodus partnership. He recently completed his first 5K race at the 2019 Downtown Run Around.
How did you get to Exodus?
I’ve been at Exodus since this past December. Before that, I was at Union Gospel Mission [in St. Paul] for seven or eight months. I actually came to Minnesota from Ohio three years ago after my uncle overdosed on drugs. That was a wake-up call for me, and it motivated me to go to rehab. I had a friend at Turning Point here in Minnesota, so I decided to come here. When I completed it, I didn’t want to return to my old lifestyle back in Ohio, so I decided it was best for me to stay here. Through talking with a lot of people I eventually got into Exodus House, though this is not where I will stay forever. My goal is to get a place of my own.
Why did you decide to join Mile in My Shoes?
It fed into what I know I need to do - improve my fitness, and spend time with professional people. When I first started, I realized that being a part of MiMS meant spending time with “regular people”. I wasn’t used to being with regular people, and it was a breath of fresh air to spend time with folks who are healthy living, not part of some program. It’s important to me that I am interacting with high-functioning people. And, it allows me to have meaningful conversations with people without being judged - these [my teammates] are professional people who don’t judge and listen to my issues. It’s kind of like therapy!
What has been the best part about being part of the team?
Completing each milestone, each step - I’m competitive so I love completing each step and getting the reward! I’m only a few runs away from becoming an Alumni now - just a few more runs!
What has been the most challenging part?
Getting up at 5:30am every day! But honestly it’s not that challenging.
What is one goal you have set for yourself?
To make it to Alumni, get my watch and my shirt! I ran track but I never knew about the benefits of distance running like this. I know I will get there [Alumni status] so I feel good about it already, but then I’ll look ahead to the next goal!
What has been your favorite moment with Mile in My Shoes thus far?
Finishing the 5k! I lost my 5k virginity haha. My mentors Jenny B & Earl motivated me. Jenny didn’t allow me to stop running. “You’ve come this far - don’t stop now let’s keep going!” And that’s just like in life, right? I had a whole team of people helping me - they were on a mission to get me there!
If you were a cartoon character, who would you be & why?
Superman because I’m invincible!
What would you like people to know about you?
That I love you all!
What would you like people to know about Team Higher Ground?
We don’t stop, we keep going. I am so grateful to every person on my team! Thank you all for letting me run with you all. Some of the best people I’ve known.
Meet Krystal, Alumni Mentor Team Volunteers of America Roseville
Krystal heard about Mile in My Shoes before she even left Shakopee Women’s Prison in June of 2018, so she joined the team within days of arriving at VOA Roseville. A constant presence on the team until her release in December of 2018, MiMS has become so much a part of Krystal’s identity that she now takes the bus twice a week to continue to run with her team. As an Alumni Mentor, Krystal now shares her focus between her own training and mentoring new Resident Members who are just starting out.
What team do you run with?
I run with VOA Roseville.
How did you get to VOA?
I was in prison for 9 years. I applied for the work release program and got approved
Why did you decide to join Mile in My Shoes?
I started pushing myself to run more and be more active while incarcerated and when I heard about the group I instantly knew I would join!
What has been the best part about being part of the team?
The best part for me is the positivity and the encouragement that I see in EVERYONE. A lot of us has been through a lot of negative things, trauma, feeling like we don't belong and just beating ourselves up for our mistakes… Being apart of MIMS has been such a blessing and has helped me to continue on with that positivity and encouraging the next purpose.
What has been the most challenging part?
There really haven’t been any challenges for me. I just want to see more people join and enjoy MiMS like I do!!!!
What is one goal you have set for yourself?
I want to run at least a half marathon this year!
What has been your favorite moment with Mile in My Shoes thus far?
EVERY MOMENT HAS BEEN SO INSPIRING… SO THE NEXT ONE WILL BE MY FAVORITE!
What is your favorite thing about yourself?
I like that I'm determined and SUPER extroverted!
If you were a cartoon character, who would you be & why?
Tigger from Winnie the Pooh.
What would you like people to know about Team VOA Roseville?
What I would like people to know about Team VOA Roseville is… WE'RE PRETTY FREAKING AWESOME!!!!
Meet Kelly, Resident Member Team Volunteers of America Southside
Kelly joined Mile in My Shoes in late August of 2018 and reached Alumni status less than two months later, reaching twenty runs in record time. In fact, Kelly did not miss one run during his entire season with Team VOA SS, achieving perfect attendance. He became Team Captain in October, and continues to lead the team during winter runs now that the official season has come to a close. Kelly will soon be moving out of VOA and into his own place - just down Lake Street, so he can continue to run with his team.
Below is a transcript from the speech Kelly gave at the MiMSies on December 4, 2018.
I initially joined Mile in my Shoes just to keep my cardio up until I could start going to the gym again. Then after a few runs and getting to know some of the people I realized it was much bigger than that. The groups positive attitudes and willingness to treat me/us like actual people; the seed was planted.
My experiences with Mile In my shoes is only 3 months old… but what a great 3 months! I have done things in this group I never thought I could do: I ran a 6:45 mile, multiple runs of 4+ miles, ran uphill and downhill, over the river and through the woods, ran when it was raining, ran when it was sunny, ran when it was so cold my eyelashes froze to my hat, ran my first ever official timed event; the Drumstick Dash 5K on Thanksgiving and I did a crossfit workout that had me sore for 4 days. With this group I have pushed myself in ways I never thought I could. And not just physically, but also mentally and emotionally.
Emotionally, I had to open up to a group of people I knew nothing about. They were a running group and that is about all I knew. But I soon realized it the same for them; They knew nothing about me, but also they are much more than just a running group. I’ve run with everyone in the group at least once and some more than once, but with every run I found myself becoming more and more comfortable until I finally told the group my love of twizzlers and confessed my not-so-ashamed to admit it love of Kelly Clarkson music.
Mentally, well… no one likes an alarm yelling at you at 5am. But to realise what you are about to do at 6am takes a lot of mental toughness. Especially when its cold or raining. We are all blurry eyed. The old saying “misery loves company” should almost be our morning run motto. But it is worth it every single time. Every morning when you have to crawl out of bed, lace up your running shoes and face the world makes you more prepared to face the challenges of the day.
Personally, I had to overcome some mental blocks. I’ll be the first to tell you I am not a leader. I am the guy in the back taking directions and following other people. When I was asked to take the Team Captain position I was very hesitant. “ I can’t do this” I thought to myself. But the more I thought about it the more I knew I had to do it. I had to open myself up to trying new things and pushing myself mentally. So, I did it and it has been great. It has helped me out in so many ways. To being more assertive in everyday life to being able to stand up here and give this speech. If not for the opportunity to be the Captain, I would not be standing up here tonight.
As some of the Run Mentors know, I lost my parents pretty close together. My Mother died May 6th 2018. I was 17 days from getting out of prison after doing almost 11 years and I called home one Sunday and my Father tells me my Mom died in a house fire. My initial reaction was shock. I was speechless.
The backstory with my Mom is we had a falling out back in 2013. She was still drinking after years and years of struggling to kick it. She was lying about what was going on in her life. About her health and living situations. I was 29 years old. I dealt with her stuff for so long I was fed up. I thought I need to do something drastic to pull her up. So I wrote her a long heartfelt letter. Filled with things I had been holding back for years. Hoping this was the way to break her from her funk. The letter I received back I can not repeat in this because kids may read it. I figured it was hopeless after that. My Mom always use to use the saying, “ Love you warts and all.” And some of you may be thinking how could I do this to my mother. Let me say first; I loved my Mom. With all my heart. But there comes a time when you just can’t take anymore. The Last time I saw my Mother was July 4th, 2009 at a visit in prison. Letting my Mom go like that is a decision I have to live with the rest of my life.
I lost my Father shortly after I was released from prison [and staying at VOA]. Somewhere around 50 days actually. July 15th 2018. He had been battling Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease for a good 10 years. Losing my Father was the hardest thing I ever went through. I would do a million years in prison just to have him back. He was the #1 supporter after my arrest. The only one who consistently came to visit me even when I got sent down to eastern Texas. I called him every Sunday. During football season we would talk trash about each other’s teams with me being a Vikings fan and him a Packers fan. I miss him like crazy and if he was still around he would have been my guest at the MiMSies. If not for him I would not have come out of prison as well as I did.
I haven’t told many people this story. One Sunday in the middle of September i woke up at the halfway house, grabbed my phone and dialed my Dad’s number… only to realize after the first ring that he was not going to pick up ever again. So, what did I do? I got dressed, laced up my running shoes and ran. I only get an hour to run but I swear I ran 10 miles. I ran the 4 mile run and up and down Lake Street about 4 times. When I got done I felt I could do it all again but I also felt better. It helped me clear my head of all the pain I was experiencing at that time. It helped me heal.
I know if my parents were still alive they would be extremely proud of what I have accomplished after getting out and all the goals I have achieved since joining this group.
One of my all time favorite moments with Mile in my Shoes, and life in general, is the Saturday morning run we had when it was about 8 degrees outside. Ben, Laura, Yem, and myself. We ran down to the Lock & Dam #1 on the Mississippi river. Laura talked us into running down the hill. We did and came upon this beautiful scene of fog over the river and the sun peaking just up over the trees. (show the picture if we can) I had a moment of complete happiness. All the noise in my head and all the troubles in the world disappeared for about 5 seconds. In that moment, Even though I still had a GPS monitor on my leg, I felt free. It was a moment I will never forget. Than reality punched me in the face when I remembered we had to run back up the hill. Just one of my many great experiences with Mile in My Shoes.
The goals I have accomplished with this group are vast so I will just touch on a few. My single mile time was the first goal I achieved. I had this goal when I started running back in 2015 but was never able to achieve it. I told [Run Mentor] Justin the morning of the timed mile “ I want to go as fast as possible” - anything over 7 minutes and I was going to be disappointed. So we ran. Justin is a freaking gazelle. I’m huffing and puffing at 3/4th of a mile and Justin isn’t even breathing hard. I ran a 6 minute and 45 second mile. I am very proud of that accomplishment. Running more than 4 miles. This was more of a personal goal I didn’t tell anyone about. My first Saturday run we ran 6 miles. A very windy day and a route with a bunch of hills. We got to the east side of the bridge over the Mississippi and I lost my legs. I told Jason right before we got back to the bank parking lot where I lost my legs. But I just kept pushing. Finally, my 5K time. When I first started running with the group I decided the Drumstick Dash was going to be my first event. I ran some approximate 5K’s before but nothing ever official. My goal was 23 minutes. My pacer was Whitney and she was very helpful. Telling me not to start out too quickly, which we kind of did. First mile was a 7:14. Maybe it was the cold or the excitement of the event, but my legs felt heavy and about 1.5 miles into the run I got a stitch in my side, but I couldn’t stop. Whitney would not have let me. So, I pushed through. I thought about all the runs and all the people cheering me on. I ran a 23 minute and 12 second first-ever 5K. And that was on a bad day! But this is what this group does. It makes you push yourself and achieve things you never thought you could. All of these goals would not have happened without this group.
Mile in My Shoes has changed my life in so many ways. The first is giving me the confidence to stand up here in front of a large group of people, most of whom I don’t know, and give this speech. Four months ago I wouldn’t do this. It has giving me the courage to be a leader. To challenge myself and push my limits. This group has changed me into the person I am today, a better (and faster) person.
While all of the Mile in my Shoes members are important, there are a few I want to thank personally.
First, Whitney: Thank you for pacing me at the Drumstick Dash. If not for you I would have stopped and failed to achieve my goal. Whitney was actually the person who asked if I wanted to give this speech. I was thinking of asking anyway so it all kind of worked out in the end. Thank you Whitney.
Ben: You are inspiring. You came from dark times and now bring so much light to this world. You inspire, you challenge, and you embrace everyone around you. I am so happy I get to run with you and share in these experiences with you. Thank you Ben.
Finally, Mishka. Without you none of this happens. You guys have created something amazing. You have helped so many people achieve goals they never thought possible and pushed so many people to do things they never thought they could do. I think I speak for everyone in this room when I say; Thank you!
With that I will close.. It has been an honor running with this group and I look forward to years of more running, hundreds of goals accomplished, and thousands of lives changed. Thank you.
Meet Earl, Alumni Member Team Higher Ground Minneapolis
Earl joined Team Higher Ground in the spring of 2017 shortly after entering Higher Ground’s first floor emergency shelter. Over the past two seasons, Earl has proven to be one of the most consistent members ever from first floor - where guests must take all of their belongings with them each morning and line up each afternoon to secure a bed. Earl is known for: Helping wake up and motivate new members, his warm smile, photographing each morning run, and his penchant for “sneaking” music to the runs. Last month, after 18 months at Higher Ground, Earl moved into his own apartment. He returns to Higher Ground each Tuesday and Thursday mornings to run with his team.
What would you like people to know about you?
I would like people to know I just finished up a wrongfully 13-year conviction for rape … and that it has destroyed my life.
I entered prison in 2004 only to witness more corruption and unspeakable acts from staff that has greatly scarred me for life both physically and mentally. I have tried unsuccessfully to clear my name only to be blocked on all levels by a system that makes things go the way they want it. I give much praise to former Brooklyn Park Detective Koni Porter, who tried to help prove my innocence in 2007 after the MN Supreme Court upheld this conviction. This was a grave injustice that keeps me awake weeks at a time.
I was released on Parole May 3rd, 2017. With no money and nowhere to go, I went to the Higher Ground shelter where I lived for the past 18 months.
What made you decide to join Mile in My Shoes?
I joined Mile in My Shoes in June 2017 after noticing the MiMs poster. Immediately I was taking by the name “Mile In My Shoes” - I remember thinking if only people knew what my shoes been through. I started running in Prison in 2008 after learning I would be there a while fighting for my life, and after learning I had Hepatitis B - a virus they [prison system] knew [I had] for almost 4 yrs without telling me or treating it. So I joined also to stay healthy - physically and mentally.
What has been the best part about being part of the team?
Being part of a team that’s supportive and encouraging is the best part of being a member of MiMs and it’s why I continue to come back.
What has been the most challenging part?
The most challenging part of being a member is not [having the ability] to get adequate sleep and rest, when you’re living in a box with all these people you don’t know, and then getting yourself up at 6am to run with the team.
What is one goal you have set for yourself? Have you achieved it yet?
One goal I set was to have faster race times than last year. Yes, I achieved it!
What has been your favorite moment with Mile in My Shoes thus far?
My favorite moment was during the City of Lakes half-marathon last year, Mishka my running mentor/pacer was giving me crap about my music while running … well by the end of the race we were signing along with the music, getting other runners singing too, and a few [came up to me after and] thanked me ….one song in play was Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing”!
Recently you moved out of Higher Ground and into your own place. What has that been like? What has kept you returning to Mile in My Shoes for the runs?
I recently moved into my own space and it feels great!! I continue to come and Mentor new members because I was there in the same position and I know that it helped me get through some of my worst moments, that’s what motivates me.
Meet Terry, Alumni Member Team Higher Ground St. Paul
Terry (pictured above on left) joined Team Higher Ground St. Paul at the start of the 2018 season. A clear leader, Terry became Team Captain and lead the enormous all-team warmup at the 2018 Torchlight 5K race. Says Team Higher Ground St. Paul Team Leader Corey, “Regardless of the temperature or amount of sunlight at 6am, Terry’s “good morning” exclamation to start warm ups gives a better jolt to our residents than a cup of morning coffee or a wake up bugle horn at summer camp.We’re so lucky to have such a wonderful team captain in Terry!”
How do you happen to find yourself living at Higher Ground - how did you get here?
On a train from Utica, NY… I arrived in MN one year ago today coming off a 12-year relapse with alcohol. I also live with a boatload of mental health issues. My daughter Commarrah has lived here for five years, and that's why I ended up here. I have been sober for a year now.
What made you join Mile in My Shoes?
My youngest child Lila died on January 3, 2018. When I got back from New York I was looking for ways to keep sane. I wanted to make a commitment to something; anything. I have never done any sports at all and I have two titanium knees. But I went to the initial MiMS meet and was told that with the right pair of running shoes, ya never know!
What has been the best part about being part of the team?
The encouragement getting and giving
What has been the most challenging part?
BREATHING
What is one goal you have set for yourself? Have you achieved it yet?
A ten minute mile. Not yet but working on it!
What has been your favorite moment with Mile in My Shoes thus far?
The tunnel that we do at the end of each run!
What is your favorite thing about yourself?
My compassion and intelligence.
If you were a cartoon character, who would you be & why?
A combination of Tigger and Eeyore. Together they are bipolar just like me!
What would you like people to know about Team Higher Ground St. Paul?
Every mile changes you!
Meet Jennifer B., Resident Member
of Team VOA Roseville
Jennifer (pictured at right above) was one of the first VOA Reentry Center residents in Roseville to sign up for Mile in My Shoes, and several of her fellow members credit her encouragement as the reason they joined the team. The team's Resident Manager, Mike J, says of Jennifer: "She’s our only resident to have been at every run, and comes out that door every morning with a smile. She’s come up with thoughtful questions of the day on the spot, encouraged several of her fellow residents to join MiMS, and fights for advocacy within the community. We have 15 residents, but dunno what we’d do without Jen." Find out more about Jennifer by reading our interview with her!
How did you get to VOA?
Where do I even start... from childhood?! LOL! To make a long story short: 17+ years of trauma, drug abuse, and a major alcohol problem is what led me to work release at the VOA. As a result of trauma endured at an early age, I never knew or was taught a healthy way to deal with my emotions and trauma.
The only way I knew how to cope with everything I buried deep inside was to drink and use [drugs]. After a ten-year relationship fell apart I started drinking very heavily - since I was a bartender this was an easy thing to do. I didn't know how to be alone after [the breakup] and I got into an extremely unhealthy rebound relationship that was so mentally, verbally, emotionally, and physically abusive I couldn't find a way out.
I know what you are thinking...why would you stay? Well, when your self-esteem is so low and you don't have a relationship with God you truly think and feel that this is as good as it will ever be... When you're cheated on, lied to, and treated like you are nothing you really start to believe it, especially if you don't know that God loves you or understand what that love really even is.
I don't really want to get into the details of "my crime" that led me to prison... I still have a lot of shame around it that I am working through, but I will tell you that the 32 months I spent in Shakopee prison were a blessing in disguise. This was the hardest time of my life and prison is a dark, depressing place, but I am now 3 1/2 years sober and stronger than I have been. The trials in prison are hard to even speak about, but it was in prison that I fell upon sacred ground and I was changed from the inside out. I still am healing everyday and it takes work, but I'd rather work to heal than work to barely breathe, immersed and drowning in the never-ending cycle of insanity with alcohol.
So here I am with six months of work release at the VOA … and re-starting my life at 33 years old. The challenges of finding housing with a felony is a battle I never thought I'd have to encounter and my heart breaks every time I have to explain my felony to anyone I want to rent from … because it is then that the words I hate to hear haunt me and slap me in the face: "No."
So I keep putting one foot in front of the other and trust in God to bring the right things to me as long as I keep putting in the foot work. The VOA staff is a great support for us and I am grateful for them all, they never make you feel like you are less than and the fact that the staff was willing to let Mile In My Shoes start a running program with us says how much they care about our re-entry and success. Thank you, VOA and MIMS, for your ability to come alongside us and be our mentors, support, friends, and leaders. Your compassion and honesty is refreshing.
Last, but never least I want to thank my family for standing by my side through everything, my incarceration and turning my life around has brought us together closer than we have ever been. Most importantly my son Jordyn, he is my angel and he is the reason I run, I changed, and I keep pushing forward no matter what trials I face. I love you Son!! Also my best friends Carly, Lacey and Dawn Rassett - we got through our prison time together and without them I would have never made it.
Why did you decide to join Mile in My Shoes?
I decided to join MIMS because I am on a new journey in life of conquering my fears and facing challenges. I never thought I was a runner or that I could run long distance. I want to prove to myself that my mind is my only barrier to my success and that if I feel the urge in my spirit that I will fight through the mental roadblocks and do what I thought couldn't be done. If I had not been forced to endure 3 years of incarceration I would have never known how strong I really am... Every time I run with MIMS these are the things I think about.
What has been the best part about being part of the team?
I love the camaraderie of being in a team. I used to play sports growing up and I love being around like-minded people. The fact that these complete strangers want to run with me, even when I might be the slowest on the team, is so heartwarming I just can't get enough... They are funny, uplifting, and it is so awesome for all of us "residents" to be able to laugh and smile knowing that we have all come out of the same darkness of incarceration. There is a light that is around the group that I can't explain and when we are all warming up together I can feel the positive energy and it is infectious.
What has been the most challenging part?
Ha, the running! But I feel so so good when I push through and make it.
What is one goal you have set for yourself?
A small one is to run 4 miles without stopping, and to get a 25-26 min 5k. I have done a 28-minute 5k and I really want to beat that.
What has been your favorite moment with Mile in My Shoes thus far?
Thus far my favorite moment was our first 5K together (the Second Chances 5K) and when we all warmed up together before the race in a big circle and there were so many of us in blue shirts and we were the only team out there warming up together. Not only did it look cool, it felt great to be part of something bigger than myself.
What is your favorite thing about yourself?
My heart and my smile.
If you were a cartoon character, who would you be and why?
Well, I think I would pick Wonder Woman. She is so strong, courageous, believes there is good in the world, and kicks some major ass!
What would you like people to know about you?
That I am more than a pretty face...I have a great mind, personality and spirit, but so many people judge me on the way that I look and never take the time to get to know me and that hurts.
What would you like people to know about Team VOA Roseville?
That we never give up!!
What's next for you?
I just landed a job as a Crane Operator Apprentice with the Local 49er International Union of Operating Engineers (another thing I never thought I was good enough to do), and I will be working with Ames Construction on the 35W/Lake ST project. God is good and I plan on trying to make this world a better place, everyday, in every way, one foot in front of the other.
Meet Team Higher Ground St. Paul's Warren!
Warren was one of the first members of MiMS’ newest team, Higher Ground St. Paul, and has been a central presence ever since. A natural comic who is up for almost anything, Warren went from struggling through his first mile a few months ago to preparing for his first 10K on September 30th - which he will run in a sparkly tutu. While the showmanship may come easily, the distance running has not. But Warren’s dedication to completing this goal - participating in not just two but three runs per week - has proven an inspiration for his teammates, most of whom come from Higher Ground’s overnight emergency shelter. Read on for more of Warren’s story, as told by MiMS volunteer David Stewart:
Warren is Minnesota-born, having grown up just west of the Cities in the beautiful Chaska / Waconia area. There aren’t so many families anymore the size of the one Warren came from: he was the third of seven kids! He attended Lutheran schools as a child, though that’s not a faith tradition he identifies with now.
Before moving to Higher Ground in downtown Saint Paul he lived for a time with one of his three sons and grandson. When some tensions arose there, he moved to Higher Ground St Paul, where he has mostly lived for the past few years.
The way he describes himself is as “good with his hands,” which helps explain why he has enjoyed the problem-solving side of working for drain companies. It’s not simply getting the drains cleared, but sparing a customers the stress and hassle of trying to fix the problem themselves – that’s what makes it fun. Warren now volunteers in the kitchen of Higher Ground, helping fix breakfast for the other residents. It gives him a lot of fulfillment to be offering something positive where he lives.
Warren started with Team Higher Ground this past June, and was immediately impressed with how welcoming the group was. “Nobody is ever made to feel bad if for whatever reason they aren’t able to show up.” There is a shared sense of overcoming obstacles when they succeed together. And being a regular participant in a running group offers something surprising for Warren - a tangible way of giving back to the group by being a dependable member. His own dedication to showing up regularly (nearly 100% attendance!) in turn helps other people to become more reliable – the sense of not wanting to let the team down.
Getting involved with MiMS seems like a different experience for everybody, and for Warren it was partly returning to his experience running cross-country as a high school student. While Warren has some physical health issues that made him hesitant about a return to running, he has found that having the proper gear, making sure to warm up, and learning to pace himself have made running possible. He noted that for some people the initial appeal of joining MIMS is the offer of “free shoes,” which is understandable. However, once people join that becomes far less important than the benefit of getting healthy (Warren’s lost 10 pounds!) and – above all – the opportunity to be part of something positive.
Some of Warren’s favorite things about MiMS? The health benefits, the camaraderie, the inspiration of being “up and at ‘em” at 0600 - the feeling of taking charge, being prepared for activity, the excitement of being out on the street so early in the day, and of enjoying such good conversations with his teammates.
For anyone considering joining MiMS, Warren offers the following advice: “You’ll love the fellowship, and will miss it on the days you can’t come! And you can do it - I had my doubts about myself, but I’ve now run a 5K and am about to run a 10K. I’ve been so encouraged to find out what’s possible.”
Meet Jacquie, “founding member” of Team Sarah’s & Twin Cities Marathoner-in-training!
When Mile in My Shoes first visited Sarah’s … an Oasis for Women to gauge resident interest in a running team, the timing - frigid & dark mid-January - made for a bit of a hard sell. But while most of the women sighed a breath of relief upon hearing that the runs wouldn’t start until early spring, one resident begged to begin the very next morning. Ladies & Gentlemen, meet Jacquie.
One might not expect a woman raised in East Africa to so embrace a Minnesota winter, but Jacquie, it turns out, has a knack for defying expectations. The youngest of twelve children raised on a coffee plantation, Jacquie not only wasn’t athletic, she was downright sickly. Plagued by frequent nosebleeds and long bouts of Malaria, she would watch her older sister run and wish she could, too. Once, she even tried to hold onto her sister as she ran, but her nose would bleed at any exertion. While her siblings were in the field picking & digging, Jacquie was put in charge of the family store. And, she studied.
While many men in her village didn’t believe in the education of women, Jacquie’s father was different. From an early age he stressed the importance of education to Jacquie, urging her to work hard so that she could one day go to school in America. When she was reached high school age she left her village to attend school in a large city, where her health improved along with her education. She never went home again.
When she arrived in Minnesota - a popular landing spot for East African immigrants - over five years ago, she got a bit of a shock. “In my country, it is common knowledge that college in America is free,” she explained. “I had been told this, I believed this, I worked so hard to get here. Then I found out about tuition costs, I just couldn’t believe it.” While Jacquie would eventually save enough money to start college courses - she is working on a degree in Cyber Security at St. Paul College, where she’s earned scholarships thanks to her 4.0 GPA - it took many years of just trying to survive, let alone save.
Jacquie’s intro to athletics came by way of bicycle, which she took up as a means of transportation. In exchange for volunteer hours at Cycles for Change she had access to a bike. That first summer she rode over 1000 miles, many of which were around college campuses. “I refused to give up my dream of going to college,” she recalls. “I would bike by colleges and get really emotional and start crying. But I was determined to be there one day.” Jacquie took courses on bike mechanics at Cycles for Change and eventually became an American Bicyclist League Certified Instructor. “Cycling and training transformed me, I got so much confidence.” As a way to connect with & give back to her community, Jacquie would visit school, community groups, anywhere she could to teach people about cycling. “I even taught Muslim women that even with their clothing, they could still bike.”
Jacquie heard about Sarah’s a few years after arriving in Minneapolis, but she was very nervous about living in a “shelter”. “I only came to see Sarah’s because I was so desperate, it was the last straw. I was scared but I when I came to visit, it was so beautiful & peaceful. Then I walked in [to the entry hall] and saw my country’s flag and cried.” She has been a resident ever since. “I don’t know what my life would be without Sarah’s.” After years of relying on the mercy of people from her church, or struggling to pay rent, having her own bed meant the world. And being able to save some money allowed her to finally focus on school, and she began studying for the entrance tests. While Jacquie had started to run off and on since arriving in Minnesota, there were periods where money was so tight that food was scarce, and exercising was not an option. Then when school began, her schedule of classes and work (Jacquie cleans homes) left little energy for running or biking. So when Mile in My Shoes came to the monthly house meeting, Jacquie jumped at the opportunity to commit herself to running again - and wanted to start right away. She went outside the morning after the meeting to start preparing for when the MiMS team would arrive.
As soon as Jacquie heard about the possibility of running the Twin Cities Marathon, she insisted on doing it. “To run a marathon is such a big thing, even in East Africa. I could not run even one mile. Now what my sister could do, I can do in eight minutes! That’s amazing! I am so happy!” She knows that the training will not be easy. One day she realized that what she thought were miles were actually kilometers. “I’m glad I figured that out sooner than later. That first five MILE run was so much longer & harder than I thought!” But Jacquie trusts that the MiMS Run Mentors will get her there. “They come from all over to run with us in the morning. They are just awesome. They are so encouraging.”
And what does her family think of their sickly sibling now? “They used to call me a word that meant “one strength,” which is really to say, you have no strengths. Now, I am the only athlete of all of us. Now I have so many strengths.”
Meet Team Higher Ground MPLS Captain, Nick!
Resident Member Nick joined Team Higher Ground at the beginning of Cycle 1, and it soon became apparent that he was a natural - both as a runner, and as a leader. He was quickly voted Team Captain and his humble but enthusiastic personality was a great addition to the team. Despite working two jobs - one that kept him working until very late hours - Nick achieved 75% attendance and became an Alumni early in June. For this month’s profile, Nick sat down with David Stewart - a behind-the scenes volunteer who also happens to be the father of Team Higher Ground’s Team Leader, Julia.
After spending an hour recently with Nick at Caribou (the trendy one next to Target Field,) the word that will stay with me is “grateful” – how grateful he is for the positive things in his life the past few years; how grateful I am for having heard part of his story.
Nick’s about as locally-sourced as they come, having grown up and attended school in MSP’s western suburbs and studied for a couple of years at a community college here in MN; all of his extended family members live within a close radius.
Several years ago, some personal setbacks contributed to an increasing struggle with alcohol and eventually, it resulted in the loss of his driver’s license. Losing the ability to drive made securing work & affordable housing a challenge, and in early 2017 Nick ended up at Higher Ground. And now he’s grateful - for the ongoing support of his family and friends during tough times, and for having two jobs (one in drywall, one in a restaurant) that provide structure, challenge, and income. He’s especially grateful for interesting and motivated people in his life, including those he has met through MiMS.
Looking for a way to become more active, Nick welcomed the invitation to join Team Higher Ground. Right from the start, even running short distances he felt the difference in his energy and in his muscles. He likes the way the runners encourage each other to push further than they thought was possible. And it made him feel good, after a while, to be made captain of the team. One of his favorite discussion questions was “If you could live the life of any celebrity for just one day, who would you choose?” His answer: Donald Trump! (Because he thought it’d be interesting to see all the decisions that need to be made, all the meetings to attend, all the hands to shake, etc. in one day as President.)
When Nick thinks about running with Team Higher Ground, what he wants is to keep moving forward; he’s not going back to the way things were. It feels a bit like playing catch-up for years he’s lost, but he’s grateful for the different outlets that help him get stronger and enjoy life more.
I asked Nick what he would tell someone considering MiMS - “Why should one do this?” He paused thoughtfully, and responded, “It may take a little time, but running with this group will make you feel better, and it will be good for your mental health and outlook.”
Meet Yordanos, Resident Member, Team Sarah's
Ethiopian women dominate the world in middle-distance running. And all Americans hear stories of how running is so natural to East Africans that the children grow up running to school. So, can we safely assume this is how it was for Yordanos, a Resident Member of Team Sarah’s who grew up in Addis Ababa? “Oh NO!” she responds emphatically, scrunching up her nose in disgust and then bursting into giggles. “I was a chubby kid,” she reveals. “I am literally SUFFERING to try & be good at this!”
If Yordanos is indeed suffering through the morning runs, her teammates would never know it. For someone who claims to hate early mornings, Yordanos - who works at a hospital until midnight - rarely misses a 6am run & is always ready to lend a hand or a joke. What drew her to Mile in My Shoes? “I want to be healthy, but I hate the gym & the treadmill. It’s totally different having the team to support me. The mentors won’t let me stop & quit. Even when I do really bad they say I am doing great!” she says with a laugh.
The sense of community fostered through Team Sarah’s is a big draw for Yordanos, who left her extremely close-knit family at the age of 18 to come to the United States alone. In search of better education opportunities but knowing very few people, she spent several years as a resident student training in medical administration before finding Sarah’s .. an Oasis for women nearly two years ago. She has since discovered her gift for helping others and enrolled in St. Paul College, where she is studying to be a registered nurse while also working at Regions hospital. “It feels so good [to be a nurse],” she explains as a big smile breaks over her face. “You can’t magically take the pain away, but you can still make people feel better. You make a difference.” The years of hard work will soon make a difference for Yordanos, who has recently qualified for public housing & will soon take the test to become a US citizen. “Soon I will be an Ethiopian-American,” she beams proudly.
Her work ethic doesn’t always translate to her runs, Yordanos admits. “The run mentors push me - and I mean push me!” she laughs. “I will say to [Run Mentor] Isabella ‘I think I can make it to the end of the block,’ and she says, “I think you can do better than that!’ The truth is when she says I can do it, I believe it.”
So how does a self-proclaimed “non-athlete” manage to stick with the program - and always have a smile on her face? “I love the mentors. I mean, literally everyone hugs me. I wake up so tired, but then I remember who is coming and it goes away. After all, I can’t oversleep when you guys came all the way to my house!”
Meet Team Captain “King” of Team VOA
Every runner knows that running often leads to new & unexpected opportunities. For Dorrell King, that opportunity came during his very first mile with MiMS. “We got to the end of the block and here I had this choice - I could go left, or I could go right.” The kind of choice that doesn’t even register for most of us was not taken for granted by King, who has spent the better part the last 17 years in a federal penitentiary. Not new to running, King spent years literally circling the prison track for a half hour every Thursday with fellow inmates. “But we had to go the same direction, just circling, around and around,” he explains. “Now, every single run is … an adventure.”
King’s presence is commanding, both physically (Burpees every Monday! Navy Seal workout every Wednesday!) and socially. As Team Volunteers of America’s first MiMS Team Captain, he sets an energetic tone each morning and leads the team in warm-up & cool-down stretches, a routine for which his years of calisthenics prepared him well. He is also the first one ready to go each morning. “Being in an institution, for better or worse, means you are pretty much always alert, always awake,” King explained. “I hear anything, and I’m up, and I’m staying up!” But what keeps him coming back every run? “Well, I’m a big commitment person. I do what I say I’m going to do, and it’s important to be surrounded by others who are committed to stuff - positive stuff. Like all of you.”
If King is right about following through on his commitments, we can expect to see big things from him in the future. While he says that he joined Mile in My Shoes “just to stay in shape, and really just to do something,” he got a surprise during his first run with the team. “I figured I’d just come and run a bit. Then I met all of these Run Mentors who have run marathons and I thought heck, maybe I can run a marathon!”
Like training for a marathon, King knows that the process of re-entry consists of many baby steps. While his goal is to develop a re-entry program of his own one day - “one that has to include physical fitness” - he will begin with his new job in a warehouse & work his way up. “I know I have an uphill battle coming up,” he says. “But I want to help others in my position see not what they can’t do, but what they can.” Spoken like a true distance runner.
Meet Alumni Member Jeff
Jeff was one of the "founding members" of Team Emanuel Housing back in April of 2015. Since then he has completed three full marathons & has two more in the works. Jeff has not only become a runner since joining MiMS, he's become a running evangelist. Jeff gave the below speech at our annual end-of-the-year celebration, the MiMSies, in December of 2016.
I was born in the suburbs of Boston and grew up in the same town - Lynnfield, MA - my whole life until I graduated from high school. I always loved the outdoors but was not "athletic" at all and never excelled at any sports. I did run track one year; my event was the 440 but I was never any good at it. Even then I could tell that distance running was more my thing. I had a five-mile out-and-back route from home that I used to run all the time by myself, just for fun. But I never thought of running any farther than that, even though this was back when Frank Shorter, Bill Rodgers and their friends were tearing up the Boston Marathon just a few miles away!
After high school I went to the University of Maine, where I got a bachelors degree in history, and then joined the US Coast Guard for four years right after college. Ironically it was the Coast Guard that eventually brought me to the landlocked prairies of Minnesota because they had a little outpost in St Paul at that time. When I got out of the service I decided to stay in the Twin Cities and so that's what I did. I worked boring jobs in Corporate America for many years before finally deciding to let somebody else do that, and I retired in 2004.
Everything went fairly well until January of 2015 when I suddenly became homeless. A ten-week journey through the social-service system in the middle of a Minnesota winter came to a successful conclusion in March of that year, when thanks to the VA, I was able to get a beautiful apartment at Emanuel Housing.
Right after I moved into Emanuel in March of 2015, I heard that they were going to start a running club of some sort. Although I had hardly run at all for decades, I thought it might be fun, and went to the introductory meeting. That was how I got involved with Mile in My Shoes.
When I first joined MiMS, we were asked to fill out a questionnaire about our goals. I wrote down that my goal was to be able to run five miles by the end of that first season, and maybe ten miles eventually. Well, I did that; and then, like Forrest Gump, I decided to just keep on going. Six months after filling out that questionnaire, I finished the Twin Cities Marathon. I then went on to finish Grandma's Marathon in June 2016 and then Twin Cities again in October 2016. As I type these words I am preparing to return to Duluth next June for my second Grandma's.
Recently Mishka asked me, why marathons? Well, because they're hard. You're doing something that most people will never do. You're probably doing something that YOU never thought you could ever do. In a 5K, you're running alongside third-graders dressed up as Spider Man. In a marathon, you don't really see a lot of that.
Although I am no longer a resident member of MiMS, the organization has made a permanent and positive change in my life. I was healthy and active before joining MiMS, but I was not a runner, and would probably never have become one without their help. Certainly I would never have become a marathoner without MiMS. The free gear and the free race entries made it possible for someone with no money to get started in a sport that is actually a lot more expensive than it looks!! But the best thing about it- the best thing about running in general - is the people you meet. This was a surprise to me. When I started, I was only expecting to get in a little better shape than I was before. I had no idea that I would meet so many wonderful people who would become such an important part of my life. That's really the best thing about it!
What advice would I give to a new member just getting started in running? Start slow, be patient, and don't give up! The hardest thing you will ever do in this sport is learning to run that first mile. Your first month is gonna be brutal. You will be doing all this new, unfamiliar stuff, and working very hard, and not seeing any evident results at all. But don't quit! You are getting better whether you realize it or not. After one of my very first group runs at Mill City, I was given a T-shirt that said "Every Mile Changes You." And you know what? It does.
People think a marathon is 26.2 miles; but it's not. A marathon is actually hundreds and hundreds of miles - and after the last 26.2, you get a medal. The road to your first marathon medal starts with the day you decide to see if you can run across the Stone Arch Bridge. Good luck!
Meet Resident Alumni & Co-Captain, Michael!
Michael “tentatively” joined Team Higher Ground at the beginning of Cycle 2 and went on to top his team in attendance. He is now an Alumni Member, and has just completed a stint as Team Captain, where he guided the team through warm-ups & began running on Saturdays.
Michael has always loved learning, and education has been a part of his journey from Starbuck, a small town in west-central Minnesota, to Oklahoma, North Carolina, and back home to Minnesota. After high school, Michael made his way to the Twin Cities, as so many kids in outstate Minnesota do. Michael enrolled at the University of Minnesota, but sometime after his first year, decided that the U wasn’t the place for him. A couple years later, Michael had a sense that he needed to get back to college, and wanted a way to move on from his current job, work that did not occupy his mind the way that learning had. Michael started back in community college and eventually completed his BA in Psychology from Macalester College. A curious person by nature, Michael had a thirst for knowledge, and continued his studies at Kent State University, earning his PhD in Psychology. While he was initially interested in clinical psychology, Michael enjoyed the science of psychology and eventually moved into experimental psychology, learning the whys and hows of the ways people work.
With his degree in hand, Dr. Michael spent more than seven years teaching around the country before eventually returning to Minneapolis to look for work closer to home. In the Twin Cities, despite the large number of public and private colleges and universities, many professors split time as adjuncts between three or four different schools just to make ends meet. Unable to find sustainable work in a saturated market, Michael eventually ended up in a shelter in 2014, and came to Higher Ground by the end of that year.
When asked how he heard about Mile in My Shoes, Michael respond, “How could I not hear about it?! People were always talking about it.” Michael was looking to do something to curb his weight gain and not having success with other kinds of exercise in the past, so he decided to give MiMS a try. He says, with a grin, that the hardest part of MiMS is. “Running. Actually the running. If it wasn’t for MiMS, I wouldn’t even think about running.” But it isn’t all bad - Michael is 61 years old and he recently reduced his personal best mile time by more than 20 seconds. A true psychologist at heart, Michael sticks with the team because he enjoys the social atmosphere and “the positive social reinforcement.”
Five months after joining MiMS, Michael still doesn’t love running, but he enjoys the people: “People are the most important thing,” he says. He was a part of the MiMS cheer squad at the Twin Cities marathon and was surprised by the energy of race day. “I never knew I could be so excited about people running!” Michael exclaimed, wearing a big grin.
Michael is currently transitioning out of his role as MiMS team captain and has enjoyed the role. He never considered himself as a leader before, but he said he has learned new things about himself along the way. And learning is something he loves - he’s been doing it his entire life.
Meet Resident Mentor & Our Newest Marathon Man, Peter!
Peter, a Team Higher Ground Resident Mentor and MiMS member for over a year, will be running the Twin Cities Marathon on October 9th. But 26.2 wasn’t always on Pete’s bucket list – in fact, he said he had never even given it a single thought, not even after he’d been running with MiMS for over a year. “It was inconceivable! Marathon running is for a different … class of people. Not for me!” So just exactly how did it come to be that Pete will be lining up for the marathon on the second Sunday in October?
Pete first heard about Mile in My Shoes soon after arriving to Higher Ground in early 2015, but it took him a few months to “warm up” to the idea of joining. “I was apprehensive at first,” he recalls. “I was intimidated – the guys who were on the team took it pretty seriously. I wasn’t sure I could hang with them.” But having heard how running could help with one’s emotional & mental well being, he decided to give it a try. His perceptions were changed almost immediately. “My first mile I ran with Mike G (Run Mentor) and he told me he too had used running to help deal with … dark feelings.” His second run, with former Run Mentor Cath, was equally positive. “We talked about real issues, and the small steps it takes to move forward. I won’t forget that.” Right away, Peter was feeling better, and found that they days he ran he felt better about himself, and things in general. Run days were the good days. And so he kept on. “The group became this therapeutic experience – the run, the hugs, the support … I left with things to chew on. I hadn’t expected that.”
Fast forward to October, and Peter has gone from zero to 10 miles in just five months. Following the TC Ten Mile race, his pacer Matt half-joked about him going for the marathon the following year: “It’s only 16 more miles!” He was exhausted and thought 16 more miles would be impossible. But then, Run Mentors began to buzz in his years. “[Run Mentor] Andy was like my Obama Yes Man – he just started to whisper ‘yes you can yes you can,’” he recalls with a laugh. “[Site Director] Mike J kept telling me I could do it, too. After awhile I guess I started to believe them.”
Pete acknowledges that completing the marathon will mean that he’s achieved something that most other people will never do – something that he never thought he’d do. But it’s the training for the marathon that has really changed the way Pete looks at life. “In other parts of my life, when things are especially tough and I feel like giving up, I remember what it feels like at mile 8 of a 16- or 18-mile training run. It may feel really tough, but if I don’t give up & quit, I always push through and finish. I’m actually looking forward to getting to that point where I want to quit, and then pushing past it. That will mean a lot to me.”
But even more than finishing, Pete is looking forward to the run itself. “There’s been this moment in all of my long races & training runs where the pain just disappears for a few moments, you break into a smile, and you almost touch some … serenity. It’s trance-like, almost mythical. There’s this realization - for even a brief moment - that all is good.”
Meet Resident Member Foxie, Team YouthLink's First Team Captain!
Foxaleece aka Foxie - has a personality as big as her name, and it was a combination of that spunk and her dedication to the team that caused her team to nominate her as the very first Team Captain of Team YouthLink, the newest addition to the MiMS family. But for the first few weeks, Foxie admits she almost didn’t stick with it.
Foxie, 20, moved into Nicollet Square - a transitional housing apartment building for youth experiencing homelessness or exiting the foster care system - in March of 2016, following several years of jumping between friends’ couches and a shelter for single adult women. Since then, she has tried to take advantage of any of the opportunities that come her way - and that included Mile in My Shoes. Self-described as “not athletic”, Foxie worried about her ability to actually run, and after the first day she had to stop so many times to walk that she considered not returning to the team and “just finding someone who loved my laziness!” But return she did, and after a couple of weeks she ran all the way to the park - over a half-mile from the start - without stopping. “I was so surprised, and proud that day,” she recalls. “I had thought y’all were lying when you said it would get easier - but it was true!”
As Team Captain, Foxie is responsible for leading the warm-up and the cool-down, keeping her team enthusiastic and on-track in general. She admits that at first she struggled to get down to the group on time, and would allow personal things to distract her. “I have a responsibility to be down on time, though, and being captain makes me feel special. I was bad at first, but now that I am more confident in the stretches & my running I’m much better.” How did she do it? “I think it’s important that the MiMS Run Mentors are flexible with us, especially when it was hard. We aren’t forced to run the whole way, they are always helping.”
Foxie is also always keeping an eye out for potential new recruits. “I’ve tried to let everyone know that it’s only an hour, it’s fun, it makes you less stressed, and then you can go back to being lazy!” While Foxie admits she is surprised by how many Nicollet Square residents have gotten involved with the team, she understands why: “The MiMS Run Mentors make it fun, not like a chore - even when the weather is bad they make it fun,” she explains. “Plus they are always happy & energetic, and it rubs off. Now I say, ‘I get to run today with the group!’”
Last week was bittersweet for Foxie & her team, as she announced that she had gotten a new job working at UPS and her schedule would no longer allow her to make the group runs. While her teammates are very excited about her new opportunity - UPS will even help Foxie pay for nursing classes, her next dream - they will miss her presence at the runs. Luckily, Foxie was able to pass on her Team Captain duties to a new young woman in whom she has confidence. “I was a newbie when I became captain, and now Jenna is new, and she will be able to do it, too.”
Now that running is coming more naturally for her, Foxie has started to run on her own when she feels stressed. “I just put my headphones in and go!” She’s also joined her fellow Resident Members in group runs on afternoons when MiMS doesn’t meet: “We come out here and we know the warm-up & cool-down now so we do it together.” On foot, and in life, this young woman is off & running.
Meet Resident Member Sir!
About a month before he heard about Mile in My Shoes, Sir decided he wanted to start running. He had read about the benefits of running and wanted to try it as a means of relieving stress and staying healthy. He had also been watching videos of parkour on YouTube and realized that he would need to have more endurance to participate in the sport that intrigued him from an early age. One of the counselors at Higher Ground recognized Sir’s new dedication and suggested he join MiMS. Sir admits that he was, at first, interested because of the promise of new shoes and possibly some running gear.
Since joining two months ago, Sir has become one of the team’s most dedicated - and speedy - members. He states that the morning runs “Give me something to look forward to.” More than anything, Sir enjoys seeing all of the other runners. He says that being a part of MiMS has made him “Feel like a human again.” Prior to joining MiMS, Sir describes himself as secluded and lonely. He now feels as though he is part of a positive community that provides great motivation, and was even chosen to serve as Team Captain.
Sir has his sights set on the Twin Cities Marathon this fall and would like to break 5:25 in the mile. He is on his way! Sir ran his first race, the Torchlight 5K, on July 20th, finishing first among his teammates - in a blistering 22:04 minutes, on a blistering hot day! He has started to join the team’s Saturday runs, and has already completed his first 10 mile run. When he’s not running, you may find Sir at Subway where he is enjoying his new position of “sandwich artist”. Next on his list? Sir hopes to secure housing within the next few months.
Meet Our Newest Resident Member, Michael!
The night Michael moved up from the emergency shelter to the pay-to-stay division at Higher Ground, MiMS was hosting a picnic to recruit new runners. Although Michael was in the process of changing habits and had been an avid runner as a young man, he admits he was nervous about the idea of committing to such a program. A self-described “lone-wolf”, Michael left home as a teenager to escape the Chicago gangs and feels as though he had to try to figure it all out on his own. However, Michael found himself being won over that evening by the members of Mile in My Shoes. He also recognized that his health needed to be a priority and that he needed to make the commitment "right then and there." He was excited to join a group of people with a strong sense of purpose, and realized that joining the program would provide him with more time to focus on his health and on building community.
Upon joining MiMS, Michael intentionally swapped his watch for the bright orange MiMS wristband that reads “Transforming lives one mile at a time”. He says it helps him remember his commitment and remain more present. Michael hopes running will be a useful tool - as it has been for him in the past - to be more focused and clear. He states that by joining the team he is reaffirming his "desire for life". His other goals for being a part of the team are to lose 25 pounds and to breathe more deeply.
How’s it going so far? Michael has not been disappointed, as he ran his first timed mile last week in 12 minutes! He recalls Dave, a fellow Higher Ground guest and MiMS Resident Mentor, telling him that starting the morning with Mile in My Shoes would carry him through the rest of the day – and “it does!” Michael enjoys the camaraderie he is developing with other runners and being a part of a larger community. He shares, "[MiMS] has allowed me to see a different profile of people that I otherwise wouldn't be able to know." He hopes that as he continues running he can “Be an advocate for people like myself." He sees MiMS as a place to continue on "the ongoing journey of self-realization" and "the fine tuning of me." Well said, Michael.
Meet Vince, the Final Team Captain for Cycle 1!
When Vince started running with Mile in My Shoes back in the spring of 2015 his fellow teammates discovered that he was quite a popular figure in the downtown area. “Hey Vince, I’m doing alright,” people would call back to him as he jogged his way down Hennepin Ave, enthusiastically greeting many people by name. This familiarity makes more sense when you learn that Vince has spent the better part of the past 20 years in downtown homeless shelters.
For more than a decade Vince, 41, slept on a mat on the floor at the former Catholic Charities shelter on Currie Avenue, along with shorter stays at other are shelters. When Higher Ground opened in 2012 he started lining up with hundreds of others each night hoping for a spot in the first floor emergency shelter. He eventually moved up to the pay-by-week shelter on the 2nd floor, where he met Dave, Manny, Brice and other tenants who were involved in Mile in My Shoes. Around that time he was spotted by Amanda, our MiMS staff liason, reading a flier about Mile in My Shoes that had been posted in an elevator. Weighing around 275 pounds at that time, Vince knew he needed a way to lose weight, and so he agreed to try it out.
By the time Vince attended the orientation for Cycle 1 this past March he’d already become a recognizable figure in the Downtown Minneapolis running community. While he’d had to take a break from attending MiMS runs last fall & winter due to a commitment at his church, Vince had taken what he’d learned about exercise & nutrition and, well, run with it. “MiMS gave me two important things – running shoes, and the [Cedar Lake]Trail. I can see the trail out my window, but I’d never been on it. I started to set my running shoes in the window so that when I wake up each day I see the shoes, I see the trail, and I have no excuse not to run.” Nearly every day this past fall & winter Vince could be spotted on the trail in his blue MiMS shirt & his bright orange shoes.
While Vince started to become recognizable to fellow runners on the trail, his current MiMS teammates can barely recognize the Vince in team photos from just a year ago. Then 275 pounds, Vince recently dropped under 200 pounds, and is closing in on his personal goal weight of 189 pounds. The changes in Vince are not only physical, however. Last year, Vince moved from the Higher Ground shelter up to the 7th floor, where he now has his own apartment – his first in over two decades. Recently, Vince has become the primary caregiver to his young son, Dacey, and he is currently waiting for approval on an application for an apartment outside of Higher Ground, where he will be able to keep his son with him overnight. Finally, Vince completed his very first race – a 10K trail race! – with his MiMS team and has his sights set on the Twin Cities Marathon in October. With so many transformations in the past year, we are grateful he’s kept his signature sideburns!
Meet Jeff, our Newest Team Captain!
For Jeff, aged 58, helping others is important above all else. So when he heard he had been chosen to be the new team captain a few weeks ago he was a bit shocked – and a little nervous – but he was up for the challenge. “I want my attitude to bring inspiration to others – you have to have a good attitude.”
Jeff, who has been living at Higher Ground for a year, first found out about Mile in My Shoes just as last season was coming to an end. So, he approached Amanda, the MiMS-Higher Ground staff liason, about his interest and then he waited patiently for nearly four months to begin. At the first info session for the 2016 season, there was Jeff. And he has been out there at 6am nearly every morning run since. Why does he do it? “I’m a helping person,” Jeff explains. “Here at the shelter, you don’t get many opportunities to take care of or care about other people. Other people matter, and this team gives me the chance to care about others.”
True to form, Jeff returned to Minnesota after living in several different states in order to be near his daughters & help out with his grandchildren – he has eight! “They motivate me to get healthy, so that I can be around to spend time with them & care for them” he explains. He spends much of his days helping his daughter – who is currently in a shelter herself – get to appointments and errands.
Jeff believes that getting back on his own two feet fully will only help others get back on theirs. After eight years in and out of shelters, he is looking forward to getting his own apartment and working again. While Jeff spent many years working in construction, building houses with his father, he also has years of custodial experience and plans to return to that line of work. However, a job directly helping others go through some of the things he’s gone through is also on his mind. “I have thought about going to school to be a counselor. I want to encourage people, not discourage them. Part of caring about someone is listening to them.”
Any member of the team can attest that Jeff leads by example, with a quiet & calm demeanor and a listening ear. But it took hard work to get there: “It took years of practice to mellow out & calm down. I’ve been at my lowest point, and I don’t plan to go back.” How does MiMS fit into the plan? “I hadn’t run in over a decade! I actually surprised myself that I could go as far as I did. Now my next goal is to run 5 miles. I just feel a lot better about myself on the days I do MiMS.”
“MiMS is a team of people who care about each other. That is so powerful.”
Meet one of the new Residential Members - and our Team Captain - Cardius.
Cardius (“like cardio”!) came to Minneapolis nearly two years ago from Chicago in order to be closer to his father, who is incarcerated. When he got to the Twin Cities he was living with an uncle and working in room service at the Westin Hotel. Within a few months of his arrival, however, Cardius tore a muscle in his knee while running for the bus, and lost his job. Shortly thereafter, Cardius’s uncle got married and moved in with his wife. This is how Carius came to be at Higher Ground.
For over a year Cardius watched Mile in My Shoes with curiosity but didn’t consider joining because of his knee. Then one day a few weeks ago, fellow member Peter saw him doing push-ups in the bathroom and approached him about joining. “Peter really challenged me to push myself,” he says. “He even promised to wake me up every day since I’m not a morning person.” Cardius also suffers from depression, so the team appealed to him because he believes “sweating it out will help.”
His initial nervousness about joining the team has dissolved over the past few weeks. “This team is a real blessing, though I didn’t see it that way at first. I didn’t have any gear, so it was a real surprise to find out I would be given the gear I needed.” But even more than the gear, it is the connection with his teammates that has been the biggest surprise to Cardius. “This is way better than I expected. I am already forming bonds with people … with friends.”
Cardius was recently chosen as the new Team Captain, which he believes will come naturally after eight years in the service industry. “But being the captain brings a new kind of responsibility, and will help motivate me to get up and get downstairs early.” In order to get a decent night’s sleep in a roomful of men, Cardius tries to go to bed very early before the bedtime noise begins. Still, he admits, his fellow teammates have graciously helped him wake in the morning – “It’s my weakness!”
He also sees his experience with the team spilling over to his personal goals. His background is in serving people (and he continues to do temp work in this field), he loves to travel & he speaks some Japanese and so would like to pursue a career as a flight attendant. “I get so much from this group already and I know I need to pass that along to others.”
He may be new to the MiMS family, but Cardius speaks for many of us when he states “This is a group of all different people … and that’s why I love it.”
Meet Brice, a Residential Member since 2014.
Brice began running with Mile in My Shoes in late 2014. Recruited by founding members Manny and Cu, Brice had seen the posters on the wall, but acknowledges that he liked to sleep. Brice decided to go to one session, felt that his first day went pretty well and has been at it ever since. A strong desire to get back into shape inspires him to keep getting up early, as does his love of the team. Brice is most excited for meeting new people and running races. Brice says his weakness is ginger ale, and his strengths are his extroversion and his strong commitment to Mile in My Shoes. Brice is studying Criminal Justice at Minneapolis Community and Technical College. Last October, Brice completed his longest race to date- the Twin Cities 10-miler. This season he’s got his sights set on the TC Marathon.